"12-mile march" joke

I was a new Army basic trainee at Fort McClellan and one requirement was a
demanding 12-mile march. We got started at 6 a.m. and were pumped up for the trek.
An hour later, feeling the heavy load of our packs, we wondered if the end would
ever come. “Men,” our sergeant yelled, “You're doing a FINE job. We've already covered four miles!”Revitalized, we picked up the pace. “And,” continued Sarge, “we should reach the
starting point any minute now.”

all we need to do is put a flashlight to your hairline then we will get the batmat symbol

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Why is santa claus always so happy?
He knows where all of the bad girls live!

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A lawyer and a blonde are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The lawyer leans over to her and asks if she would like to play a fun game. The blonde just wants to take a nap, so she politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few more...

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Judi was walking by the jewelry store one day in the midtown mall. She saw a diamond bracelet that she really liked. In the store she went.“Excuse me,” she said to the sales lady behind the counter, “Will a small deposit
hold that bracelet until my husband does more...

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If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle.

You may not fart in a public place after 6 P.M. on Thursdays. It is considered an offense to shower naked. You are not allowed to break more than three more...

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