Widow Jokes / Recent Jokes

Many, many years ago when I was twenty-three, I got married to a widow who was pretty as could be. This widow had a grown-up daughter who had hair of red. My father fell in love with her, and soon the two were wed. This made my dad my son-in-law and changed my very life. My daughter was my mother, for she was my father's wife. To complicate the matters worse, although it brought me joy. I soon became the father of a bouncing baby boy. My little baby then became a brother-in-law to dad. And so became my uncle, though it made me very sad. For if he was my uncle, then that also made him brother to the widow's grown-up daughter who, of course, was my stepmother. Father's wife then had a son, who kept them on the run. And he became my grandson, for he was my daughter's son. My wife is now my mother's mother and it makes me blue. Because, although she is my wife, she's my grandma too. If my wife is my grandmother, then I am her grandchild. And every time I think of it, it simply drives me more...

So Sven and Ole were out working in the forest one day. They had just gotten jobs as lumber jacks. Well one say they were working along cutting down all the trees that had the big red X on them.
As instructed by the foreman they were to yell 'TIMBER!' whenever the tree was about to fall. Ole was cutting down a tree and yelled 'Timber' and all of a sudden he saw a skidder pulling a tree out of the woods drive right under where the tree was about to fall. There was nothing he could do about it.
The tree fell on the cab killing poor 'ol DooDah. That was his name for his parents gave it to him. He was a young man recentley married. Well Sven and Ole didn't know what to do, so they called the priest and he said to go talk and comfort DooDah's now widow.
Well they walked out of the forest into town and arrived at the widows house. They were dumbfounded and didn't know what to think or say. So quickly as the fact the tree fell... Sven rang the doorbell.
A few minutes later more...

So Sven and Ole were out working in the forest one day. They had just gotten jobs as lumber jacks. Well one say they were working along cutting down all the trees that had the big red X on them.As instructed by the foreman they were to yell 'TIMBER!' whenever the tree was about to fall. Ole was cutting down a tree and yelled 'Timber' and all of a sudden he saw a skidder pulling a tree out of the woods drive right under where the tree was about to fall. There was nothing he could do about it.The tree fell on the cab killing poor 'ol DooDah. That was his name for his parents gave it to him. He was a young man recentley married. Well Sven and Ole didn't know what to do, so they called the priest and he said to go talk and comfort DooDah's now widow.Well they walked out of the forest into town and arrived at the widows house. They were dumbfounded and didn't know what to think or say. So quickly as the fact the tree fell... Sven rang the doorbell.A few minutes later the widow DooDah more...

Two buddies, Jim and Bill, decided to go on a ski trip, so they loaded up Jim's SUV and headed north. After driving for a few hours, they got caught in a terrible blizzard. Pulling into a nearby farmhouse, they asked the attractive woman who answered the door if it would be possible for them to spend the night.
"I know it's terrible weather out there, but I'm recently widowed and I'm afraid the neighbors would talk if I allowed you to stay in my house," she said.
"No need to worry," Jim replied, "we'd be happy to sleep in the barn."
The woman agreed, so they made their way to the barn for the night.
Approximately nine months later, Jim received a letter from the widow's attorney and immediately phoned Bill.
"Bill, my good friend, do you recall that good looking widow at the farm we stayed at?" Jim asked.
"I do," Bill replied.
"Did you happen to get up in the middle of the night and go up to the house to more...

These two police officers were traveling through the upper mid-west one February when it started to snow. The wind was blowing and it was very cold.
One of the cops spotted a light on the hill next to the road and said, "That looks like a farm up there, lets go up and see if we can get out of this blizzard."
The other one agrees and up the hill they go. When they get to the farm they find a real nice lady, explain to her that they are law enforcement officers, and they ask if they can stay in the barn until the storm blows over.
The lady explains that she is a widow with this nice comfortable 3 bedroom house and it won't be necessary to stay in the barn since they are police officers, as there is plenty of room in the house. So the two cops settle in and the widow cooks up a nice dinner and after watching some television everyone turns in.
The next morning they find the roads are clear and after a nice big breakfast the two officers thank the widow for more...

Two guys were traveling through the upper mid-west one February when it started to snow. Being guys, of course they pressed on even when road conditions were totally white-out, and they ended up in a ditch. Try as they might, they couldn't get the car un-stuck. One of the travelers spotted a light on the hill next to the road and said,' That looks like a farm up there, lets go up and see if we can get out of this blizzard.' The other guy agrees and up the hill they go.

When they got to the farm they found the occupant was a real nice lady and they asked if they can stay in the barn until the storm blows over, and they can dig their car out. The lady invites them in and makes them some hot coffee, as clearly they're very chilled.. During the conversation over the warm brew, they learn that she is a widow, living alone.

After several cups of coffee, she announces that she sees no reason for such nice guys to sleep in the barn when she has this big empty comfortable more...