Weaving Jokes / Recent Jokes

A cop sees a car weaving all over the road and pulls it over. He walks up to the car and sees a nice-looking woman is driving and smells liquor on her breath. He says, "I'm going to have to give you the breathalyzer test to determine if you are under the influence of alcohol." She blows up the balloon and he walks over to the police car. After a couple of minutes comes back and says, "It looks like you've had a couple of stiff ones." She replies "You mean it shows that, too?"

* I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer.
* Sorry, Officer. I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.
* Aren't you that guy from the Village People?
* Hey, you must have been doin' at least 120 mph to keep up with me. Good job!
* I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a cop.
* I almost decided to be a cop, but I decided to finish high school instead.
* You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?
* Didn't I see you get your ass kicked on COPS?
* Is it true that people become cops because they're too dumb to work at McDonald's?
* I pay your salary!
* Gee, Officer... that's terrific... the last officer only gave me a warning too!
* Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.
* I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there are no other cars around-that's how far ahead of me they are.
* What do you mean, "Have I been drinking?" You're more...

A cop sees a car weaving all over the road and pulls it over. He walks up to the car and sees a nice-looking woman is driving and smells liquor on her breath. He says, "I'm going to have to give you the breathalyzer test to determine if you are under the influence of alcohol." She blows up the balloon and he walks over to the police car.After a couple of minutes comes back and says, "It looks like you've had a couple of stiff ones." She replies "You mean it shows that, too?"