Wealthy Jokes / Recent Jokes
A wealthy investor walked into a bank and said to the bank manager, "I would like to speak with Mr. Reginald Jones, who I understand is a tried and trusted employee of yours."
The banker said, "Yes he certainly was trusted. And he will be tried as soon as we catch him."
A very wealthy lawyer vacationed for several weeks each year at his summer home in the backwoods of Maine. Each summer, he would invite friends to come to visit him.One summer he invited a lawyer from Czechoslovakia to visit him. The friend, eager to see how a wealthy American vacationed, gratefully agreed. They had a wonderful vacation, and spent a great deal of time exploring the woods and enjoying the natural setting.One morning, as the lawyer and his Czechoslovakian friend were walking through the woods, they were approached by two huge bears -- a male and a female. The lawyer noticed them in time to run for cover. His friend, however, was not so lucky. The male bear reached him and swallowed him whole.Seeing this, the lawyer ran to his Mercedes and sped for the nearest town to get the local sheriff. The sheriff grabbed a high-powered rifle and they raced back to the berry patch. Luckily, the bears were still there."He's in THAT one!" cried the lawyer, pointing at the more...
A wealthy man sat in his attorney's office." Do you want the bad news first or the terrible news?" the lawyer asked." Give me the bad news first." "Your wife found a picture worth a half-million dollars." "That's the bad news?" the man asked incredulously." I can't wait to hear the terrible news." "It's of you and your mistress."
Once a young woman married a very wealthy man they lived many happy years until after about 10 years he passed away, of course leaving her a very wealthy widow. Still being young after her husband had been dead a few years she met an actor they married and she saw many broadway shows, many of which he was the star, they traveled but after they’d been married about 10 years he too passed away. This was 2 husbands she had to bury. Still being a young woman of about 40, she began going to church. She met their new pastor they fell in love and married, unfortunately after a few years he to passed away. Well this is her 3rd husband she’d had to bury. Again still being a desirable woman she met a wonderful man, he was a mortician. After they’d been married about 5 years, she took ill and she passed away. Some people say…that she married 1 for the money, 2 for the show 3 to get ready and 4 to GO…
What They Say What It Means ============= ============= spacious hole in the wall to anyone living in their car that's why we're charging $200 above the going rate easy access to Particularly in Mountain View and Sunnyvale, this transportation can mean: (a) in the flight path of Moffet Field (b) next to the railroad tracks (c) next to a major road/freeway/highway (d) a&b, b&c, a&c above (e) all of the above friendly staff Doberman pincher mentality free utilities That's the only way we can entice people in this dump. Would you pay THIS rent AND the water & garbage? heated pool only when the sun's out only when there's water in it great views reach out and touch your neighbor! overlooking the garbage dumpster overlooking the pool overlooking the cute guys/gals apartment affordable to: (a) anyone with an income of $100 K (b) anyone with wealthy parents (c) anyone who is wealthy (d) anyone who wants to spend $$$ on housing pets welcome kids aren't we just never got the odor out AEK All more...
The wealthy old gentleman and his wife were celebrating their thirty-fifth wedding anniversary and their three grown sons joined them for dinner. The old man was rather irritated when he discovered that none of the boys had bothered to bring a gift, and after the meal, he drew them aside.
"You're all grown men," he said, "and old enough to hear this. Your mother and I have never been legally married."
"What?" gasped one of the sons. "Do you mean to say we're all bastards?"
"Yes," snapped the old man, "and cheap ones, too."
A certain lawyer was quite wealthy and had a summer house in the country, to which he retreated for several weeks of the year. Each summer, the lawyer would invite a different friend of his (no, that's not the punch line) to spend a week or two up at this place, which happened to be in a backwoods section of Maine. On one particular occasion, he invited a Czechoslovakian friend to stay with him. The friend, eager to get a freebee off a lawyer, agreed. Well, they had a splendid time in the country - rising early and living in the great outdoors. Early one morning, the lawyer and his Czechoslovakian companion went out to pick berries for their morning breakfast. As they went around the berry patch, gathering blueberries and raspberries in tremendous quantities, along came two huge Bears - a male and a female. Well, the lawyer, seeing the two bears, immediately dashed for cover. His friend, though, wasn't so lucky, and the male bear reached him and swallowed him whole. The lawyer ran more...