Wealthy Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    A wealthy and very well dressed financial consultant arrived at his office to fill out his report for the company he was working for.

    The dapper, extremely confident and very dignified gentleman left his Porsche with the parking attendant and entered wearing the building wearing his designer business suit. His shoes clicked along the polished floor as he headed for the elevator.

    He picked up the paperwork, and strutted into his well-furnished office, put down his fifteen hundred dollar briefcase and sat down at his desk. He stared at the questions for five minutes, and shook his head in disbelief. He looked again, and his shoulders dropped.

    "I know I have no choice, but this is an OUTRAGE!" he said out loud.

    Then with a sigh of embarrassment, he reached down, untied and pulled his feet out of his highly polished $800 Brooks Brothers cap toe dress shoes and then peeled off his black silk business socks as well.

    The now barefoot more...

    Once upon a time, there was a fellow who was down on his luck,
    and as he was looking through the classifieds, he saw an
    intriguing ad offering a ten million dollar reward to the person
    who could find and retrieve, intact, something called a "tis
    bottle."
    Having nothing to lose, he calls the man who placed the ad. "I
    absolutely must have this bottle, and there are only three
    surviving in the world," the wealthy man tells him, "one is in
    the heart of the deepest jungle, one is at the bottom of the
    coldest, darkest sea, and one is at the top of the highest
    mountain. I will pay your expenses for however long it takes to
    bring me one of these bottles, as well as giving you the ten
    million."
    Being an adventurous fellow, he decides to accept the offer.
    First, he gathers a retinue of guides and hunters to go with him
    into the jungle. He studies for months to prepare, and when he
    is more...

    Bob, an extremely wealthy 60-year-old, arrives at a country club with a beautiful and charming 25-year-old blonde.
    His buddies at the club are all aghast. They corner him and ask, "Bob, how'd you get the trophy girlfriend?"
    Bob exclaims, "Girlfriend? She's my wife!"
    His friends are shocked, but continue to ask, "So, how'd you persuade her to marry you?"
    Bob replies, "I lied about my age."
    His friends respond, "What do you mean? Did you tell her you were only 40?"
    Bob smiles and says, "No, I told her I was 90."

    Wealthy people miss one of life's greatest thrills...making the last car payment.

    What They Say What It Means ============= ============= spacious hole in the wall to anyone living in their car that's why we're charging $200 above the going rate easy access to Particularly in Mountain View and Sunnyvale, this transportation can mean: (a) in the flight path of Moffet Field (b) next to the railroad tracks (c) next to a major road/freeway/highway (d) a&b, b&c, a&c above (e) all of the above friendly staff Doberman pincher mentality free utilities That's the only way we can entice people in this dump. Would you pay THIS rent AND the water & garbage? heated pool only when the sun's out only when there's water in it great views reach out and touch your neighbor! overlooking the garbage dumpster overlooking the pool overlooking the cute guys/gals apartment affordable to: (a) anyone with an income of $100 K (b) anyone with wealthy parents (c) anyone who is wealthy (d) anyone who wants to spend $$$ on housing pets welcome kids aren't we just never got the odor out AEK All more...

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