Waitress Jokes / Recent Jokes

Two mathematicians were having dinner in a restaurant, arguing about the
average mathematical knowledge of the American public. One mathematician
claimed that this average was woefully inadequate, the other maintained
that it was surprisingly high.
"I'll tell you what," said the cynic, "ask that waitress a simple math
question. If she gets it right, I'll pick up dinner. If not, you do."
He then excused himself to visit the men's room, and the other called
the waitress over.
"When my friend comes back," he told her, "I'm going to ask you a question,
and I want you to respond 'one third x cubed.' There's twenty bucks in
it for you." She agreed.
The cynic returned from the bathroom and called the waitress over. "The
food was wonderful, thank you," the mathematician started. "Incidentally,
do you know what the integral of x squared is?"
The waitress looked pensive; almost more...

Bill Clinton and Al Gore go into a local diner for lunch.

As they read the menu, the waitress comes over and asks Clinton,
"Are you ready to order?" Clinton replies, "Yes, I'd like a
quickie!"

"A quickie?!?" the waitress replies. "Sir, given the past
situation of your personal life I don't think that is a good idea.
I'll come back when you are ready to order from the menu!" She walks
away.

Gore leans over to Clinton and says, "It's pronounced Quiche."

A man was walking past a restaurant when he noticed a sign in the window which read "Unique Breakfast" so he entered and sat down at a table.
A waitress brought him some coffee and asked what he would like to order.
"I noticed the sign in your window," he said. "What exactly is your "Unique Breakfast?"
"Broiled chicken tongue," she replied.
"Broiled chicken tongue?" Have you any idea how revolting that is? Never would I even consider eating anything that came out of a chicken's mouth!" he snarled.
Unruffled by his attitude, the waitress asked, "Well sir, what would you like then?"
"Scrambled eggs and toast," he replied.

Bill Clinton and Al Gore go into a local diner for lunch. As they read the menu the waitress comes over and askes Clinton,"Are you ready to order?" Clinton replies, "Yes, I'd like a quickie." "A quickie?!?" the waitress replies. "Sir, given the currentsituation of your personal life I don't think that is a good idea. I'll come back when you are ready to order from the menu." She walks away. Gore leans over to Clinton and says, "It's pronounced Quiche." Sent by Gail

An old man was eating in a truck stop when three rough-looking bikers walked in. As they passed the old man, the first biker pushed his cigarette into the old man's pie, then laughed and took a seat at the counter. The second biker picked up the old man's milk and spit into it. The third biker turned over the old man's plate before joining the others at the counter.Without saying a word to the laughing bikers, the old man put his money down, got up, and left the diner. One of the bikers said to the waitress, "Not much of a man, was he?"The waitress replied," Not much of a truck driver either. He just backed his big rig over three motorcycles!"

When the waitress in a New York City restaurant brought him the soup du jour, the Englishman was a bit dismayed. "Good heavens," he said, "what is this?""Why, its bean soup," she replied."I dont care what it has been," he sputtered. "What is it now?"

Two americans were walking through Leicester but couldn't agree on how to pronounce it so they decided to stop for lunch and ask the waitress. They sat down to eat their lunch and called the waitress over:"Can you tell us where we are please but say it slowly", to which the waiteress replied "Bur-ger Ki-ng"