Voices Jokes / Recent Jokes

Three couples were married and stayed at the same hotel for their honeymoons, where they were all taken care of by Dave the Bellboy. The first man married a nurse. Dave showed them to their room and thought to himself, "What a lucky guy. Nurses are known to be hot to trot". The second man married a telephone operator. Dave showed them to their room and thought to himself,"Wow, he's a lucky one. Telephone operators have sexy voices and once you pop that top button...Va-voom.". The third man married a school teacher. Dave showed them to their room and thought to himself, "Poor guy, she's pretty but teachers are just too frigid". The next morning, Dave reported to work at 5:30 in the morning. He expected only the teacher's husband to call for breakfast any minute and the other two would call much later in the day. At 6:00 a.m. the phone rang. It was the nurse's husband wanting breakfast. The nurse's husband opened the door and Dave stepped back in shock. The more...

A psychiatrist was testing the mentality of a patient. "Do you ever hear voices without being able to tell who is speaking or where the voices are coming from?" asked the psychiatrist. "As a matter of fact, I do," said the patient. "And when does this happen?" asked the psychiatrist. "Oh," said the patient, "when I answer the telephone."

Hark the bar room voices sing
Out of tune and everything
Christmas time and lets go wild
Make the persian gulf look mild
Let's get drunk and all fall down
Take the car and speed thru town
Wrap yourself around a pole
Put your family on the dole
Hark the bar room voices scream
Pass the jug of irish cream
Get up early christmas dawn
Yawn the technicolor yawn
Kids are howling with delight
You were out too late last night
Even smiling hurts your head
Open gifts, go back to bed
Hark the bar room voices bark
Where's the jug of cutty sark
Christmas comes home once a year
Don't you think you should be there
People love you, don't be jerky
Go home, eat some christmas turkey
Hug someone and then you say
Have a happy holiday

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Tell me! !
Tell me, is it going in?? yeah... is it hurting??
ooh yeah... ouch it's hurting!!!
ok i'll put it in slowly..
still hurting???
yeah.. then let's try the other shoe madam!!!!!!!!
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Baby doll! !!
A man called his 4th wife-Baby doll.
3rd wife-china doll.
2nd wife-barbie doll &
1st wife.......
Guess what??????
"PANADOL"!!!!!!!
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GOD ASKED!!!!!
God asked a civil engineer, what mistake did i make in designing a woman????
engineer says, Sir the entertainment area is very
close to the DRAINAGE!!!
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Different Voices!!!!!
Different types of voices during SEX.
ENGLISH: oh yes oh yess!
AMERICAN: yeah baby, yeah!
SRI more...

A guy walks into a bar and notices he's the only one there, apart from the barkeep, who's on the phone. The barkeep signals him that he'll be with him in a minute. The guy nods and bellies up to the bar to wait. Suddenly, he hears a little voice say, "Hey, you're looking pretty sharp today. New suit?"
The guy looks around but can't see anyone else in the place. He hears the voice again. "Seriously... you are looking good, chum. Have you lost weight?"
The guy looks around again and still doesn't see anyone. "Hello?" he asks. "Is someone speaking to me?"
"You bet! I just had to say that I thought you were looking just super!" A bunch of other tiny voices suddenly rose in agreement.
The guy realizes now that these voices are coming from a bowl of beer nuts on the bar in front of him. He stares at them as the barkeep finally hangs up and comes to serve his only customer.
"What'll you have?" asks the more...