Ucla Jokes / Recent Jokes

Did you hear about the UCLA track star who won a gold medal? He was so proud of it that he had it bronzed.

The president of ABC decided that it was time to build a new factory. He asked representatives from three development companies to come in and make a bid on the project. The three companies showed up at the scheduled meeting. The president of ABC asked the first company, Bruin Construction, who's president earned his MBA from UCLA, " How much will your company charge for this project?" "2 million," said Bruin. "1 million for materials and 1 million for labor."
Then president then asks the same question to the second company, Cardinal Construction, whose president earned his MBA from Stanford. Cardinal answered, "3 million, 1.5 million for materials, 1.3 million for labor, and 0.2 million for licenses and permits."
Finally, the president asks the last company, Trojan Construction, whose president earned his MBA from USC. Trojan answered, " 4 million."
"FOUR MILLION," yelled the president of ABC. "How do you more...

The president of ABC decided that it was time to build a new factory. He asked representatives from three development companies to come in and make a bid on the project. The three companies showed up at the scheduled meeting. The president of ABC asked the first company, Bruin Construction, who's president earned his MBA from UCLA, " How much will your company charge for this project?" "2 million," said Bruin. "1 million for materials and 1 million for labor."Then president then asks the same question to the second company, Cardinal Construction, whose president earned his MBA from Stanford. Cardinal answered, "3 million, 1.5 million for materials, 1.3 million for labor, and 0.2 million for licenses and permits."Finally, the president asks the last company, Trojan Construction, whose president earned his MBA from USC. Trojan answered, " 4 million.""FOUR MILLION," yelled the president of ABC. "How do you breakdown the more...

Man, your mom's like the UCLA; every year she gets beaten up by a lot of Trojans!

Did you hear about the guy who went into a bar to watch the UCLA-USC game last year, and had a little dog with him?
The bartender told him he needed to take the dog outside, but the guy told him that the dog was a huge football fan. Every time UCLA scored a touchdown, the dog would bark, wag his tail and run around excitedly.
At the end of the game, when UCLA had won, the dog did a back flip! The bartender was amazed.
"That's great," he said. "But what does he do if USC wins?"
The guy said, "I don't know. The dog's only 7 years old!"