Twinkle Jokes / Recent Jokes

What do you get if you cross Father Christmas with a detective?
Santa Clues!
Father Christmas win a saucepan in a competition.
Now thats what you call pot luck!
What do the reindeer sing to Father Christmas on his birthday?
Freeze a jolly good fellow!
What do you call a man who claps at Christmas?
Santapplause!
Twinkle Twinkle chocolate bar
Santa drives a rusty car
Press the starter
Press the choke
Off he goes in a cloud of smoke!
Who delivers presents to baby sharks at Christmas?
Santa Jaws!
Why does Father Christmas like to work in the garden?
Because he likes to hoe, hoe, hoe!
Why is a cat on a beach like Christmas?
Because they both have "Sandy claws"!
What does Father Christmas call his money?
Iced lolly?
What's Father Christmas called when he takes a rest while delivering presents?
Santa pause!

Twinkle Twinkle Little White Star
Your Bibi went to the Bazaar
There She Found a Real Manly Yar
A Shudra Goonda named Kallar!
His Big Black Cock from Malabar
Taught Her how Small Aryan Boys Are!
Now She's Run Off to Tranquebar
So Jerk Off like the Fool You Are!

How do you get a twinkle in a Blonde's eye?
Shine a flashlight in her ear.

What do you get if you cross Father Christmas with a detective? Santa Clues! Father Christmas win a saucepan in a competition. Now thats what you call pot luck! What do the reindeer sing to Father Christmas on his birthday? Freeze a jolly good fellow! What do you call a man who claps at Christmas? Santapplause! Twinkle Twinkle chocolate barSanta drives a rusty carPress the starterPress the chokeOff he goes in a cloud of smoke! Who delivers presents to baby sharks at Christmas? Santa Jaws! Why does Father Christmas like to work in the garden? Because he likes to hoe, hoe, hoe! Why is a cat on a beach like Christmas? Because they both have "Sandy claws"! What does Father Christmas call his money? Iced lolly? What's Father Christmas called when he takes a rest while delivering presents? Santa pause!

Q: How do you make a blonde's eyes twinkle?
A: Shine a flashlight in her ear.

Questions that have Confused humankind!!
a.. Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "
I think I'll
squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?"
a.. Who was the first person to say "
See that chicken there....I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta it's butt."
a.. Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a
horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
a.. Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
a.. If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?
a.. Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
a.. If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
a.. Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?
a.. Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed more...

Questions that have Confused humankind!!
Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?"
Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there....I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta its butt."
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?
Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?
Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?
Why more...