Technician Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    One day, a Mechanical Engineer, Electrical Engineer, Chemical Engineer and Computer Engineer were driving down the street in the same car. All of a sudden, the car broke down.

    The Mechanical Engineer said, "I think a rod broke."

    The Chemical Engineer said, "The way it sputtered at the end, I don't think it's getting gas."

    The Electrical Engineer said, "I think there was a spark and something is wrong with the electrical system."

    All three turned to the computer engineer and said, "What do you think?"

    The Computer Engineer said, "I think we should all get out and get back in."

    A lady came to the hospital to visit a friend. She had not
    been in a hospital for several years and felt very ignorant
    about all the new technology. A technician followed her
    onto the elevator, wheeling a large, intimidating looking
    machine with tubes and wires and dials. "Boy, would I hate
    to be hooked up to that thing," she said.
    "So would I," replied the technician. "It's a floor-cleaning
    machine."

    A communication technician drafted by the army was at a firing range. At the range, he was given some instruction, a rifle and 50 rounds. He fired several shots at the target. The report came from the target area that all attempts had completely missed the target.
    The technician looked at his weapon, and then at the target. He looked at the weapon again, and then at the target again. He then put his finger over the end of the rifle barrel and squeezed the trigger with his other hand. The end of his finger was blown off, whereupon he yelled toward the target area: "It's leaving here just fine, the trouble must be at your end!"

    ' Newbie computer user questions'

    1. Compaq is considering changing the command' Press Any Key' to' Press Return Key' because of the many calls asking where the' Any' key is.

    2. AST technical support had a caller complaining that her mouse was hard to control with the dust cover on. The cover turned out to be the plastic bag the mouse was packaged in.

    3. Another Compaq technician received a call from a man complaining that the system wouldn't read word processing files from his old diskettes. After trouble- shooting for magnets and heat failed to diagnose the problem, it was found that the customer labeled the diskettes by rolling them into a typewriter to type on them.

    4. Another AST customer was asked to send a copy of her defective diskettes. A few days later a letter arrived from the customer along with xeroxed copies of the floppies.

    5. A Dell technician advised his customer to put his troubled floppy back in the drive and more...

    Experiencing problems with his computer, an incognizant user called technical support for assistance...
    Technician: Good morning. How may I help you?
    Customer: There's smoke coming from my computer's power supply.
    Technician: Sounds like you need a new power supply.
    Customer: No, I don't! I just need to change the startup files.
    Technician: Sir, what you described is a faulty power supply. It needs to be replaced.
    Customer: No way! Someone told me that I just have to change the system startup files to fix the problem! All I need is for you to tell me the right command.
    For the next several minutes, despite the technician's efforts to explain the problem and its solution, the customer adamantly insisted that he was right. So, in frustration, the technician responded...
    Technician: I'm sorry. Normally we don't tell our customers this, but there is an undocumented DOS command that will fix the problem.
    Customer: Aha! I knew it!
    Technician: Add the more...

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