Swedish Jokes / Recent Jokes

Two norwegians were telling swedish jokes. "Do you know how to save a swede from drowning?" the one said. "No," his friend said after a little while. The first norwegian grinned, "Oh, That`s good."

There were these two swedish twins who looked so incredibly alike, that sometimes they borrowed money from each other without the other really knowing about it.

A swedish road-worker was hired to paint the line that goes down the center of the road. The first day he managed to paint 2 kilometers, and his boss was very pleased. The next day he only painted 200 meters, but his boss thought that he`d probably started off too hard on the first day. But on the third day he was only able to paint 20 meters. The boss called him into the office and demanded an explanation. "Well, you see it`s getting so darn far to walk all the way to the paint bucket," the swede explained.

Q: What is the similarity between drinking a Cola and a swede`s laugh? A: You can`t beat the feeling.

Q: What are beautiful women in Sweden called? A: Tourists.

A swede was travelling on the night-train, but he couldn`t find his seat. The conductor asked him if he could approximately remember where it was. "No," the swede said, "all I can remember is that there was a river outside of it."

Q: What is the penalty for suicide in Sweden? A: Life in prison.