Strange Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    An old man and woman were married for years even though they hated each other. When they had a confrontation, screams and yelling could be heard deep into the night. A constant statement was heard by the neighbors who feared the man the most. "When I die I will dig my way up and out of the grave to come back and haunt you for the rest of your life!" They believed he practiced black magic and was responsible for missing cats and dogs, and strange sounds at all hours. He was feared and enjoyed the respect it garnished. He died abruptly under strange circumstances and the funeral had a closed casket. After the burial, the wife went straight to the local bar and began to party as if there was no tomorrow. The gaiety of her actions were becoming extreme while her neighbors approached in a group to ask these questions: Are you not afraid? Concerned? Worried? that this man who practic ed black magic and stated when he died he would dig his way up and out of the grave to come back more...

    Cesium's Strange
    (Tune, People are strange - The Doors)
    Cesium's strange,
    when you're a stranger
    Consummate danger,
    ready to blow.
    Water is wicked,
    wet and unwanted,
    Folks are unfriendly,
    when you glow.
    Don't take it out in the rain.
    You're insane!
    You're insane!
    Don't you remember the pain?
    You're insane!
    You're insane!
    You're insane -
    Cesium's strange,
    pregnant with danger,
    Hand the next stranger
    a kilo or two.
    Pour on the water,
    lamb at the slaughter,
    Bathe in the light
    that is blue, sky-blue!
    Don't take it out in the rain.
    You're insane!
    You're insane!
    You'll always remember the pain.
    You're insane!
    You're insane!
    You're insane -
    - Songs of Cesium #13

    Cesium's Strange
    (Tune, People are strange - The Doors)

    Cesium's strange,
    when you're a stranger
    Consummate danger,
    ready to blow.
    Water is wicked,
    wet and unwanted,
    Folks are unfriendly,
    when you glow.

    Don't take it out in the rain.
    You're insane!
    You're insane!
    Don't you remember the pain?
    You're insane!
    You're insane!
    You're insane ---
    Cesium's strange,
    pregnant with danger,
    Hand the next stranger
    a kilo or two.
    Pour on the water,
    lamb at the slaughter,
    Bathe in the light
    that is blue, sky-blue!

    Don't take it out in the rain.
    You're insane!
    You're insane!
    You'll always remember the pain.
    You're insane!
    You're insane!
    You're insane ---

    --- Songs of Cesium #13

    A lawyer named Strange died, and his friend asked the tombstone maker to inscribe on his tombstone, "Here lies Strange, an honest man, and a lawyer."

    The inscriber insisted that such an inscription would be confusing, for passers - by would tend to think that three men were buried under the stone. However he suggested an alternative. He would inscribe, "Here lies a man who was both honest and a lawyer."

    That way, whenever anyone walked by the tombstone and read it, they would be certain to remark, "That's Strange."

    " The first one is free" "Download a free trial version". Have important South-Asia connections (to help move the stuff) Have important South-Asia connections (to help debug the code). Strange jargon: " Stick", " Rock", " Dime bag", " E" Strange jargon: " TCP/IP", " XML", " Java", " SQL". Realize that there's a ton of cash in the 14- to 25-year-old market Realize that there's a ton of cash in the 14- to 25-year-old market. Job is assisted by industry's producing newer, more potent mixes Job is assisted by industry's producing newer, faster machines. Often seen in the company of pimps and hustlers Often seen in the company of marketing people and venture capitalists Their products cause unhealthy addictions. DOOM. Quake. SimCity. Duke Nukem 3D.; Enough said. Do your job well and you can sleep with sexy movie stars who depend on you Damn! Damn! DAMN!

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