Snakes Jokes / Recent Jokes

What subject are snakes good at school? Hiss-tory!

Q: Why did St. Patrick drive the snakes out of Ireland? A: He couldn't afford plane fare.

Q: How can you tell if a lawyer is well hung?
A: You can’t get a finger between the rope and his neck!

Q: If you are stranded on a desert island with Adolph Hitler, Atilla the Hun, and a lawyer, and you have a gun with only two bullets, what do you do?
A: Shoot the lawyer twice.

Q: What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?
A: A good start!

Q: How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?
A: His lips are moving.

Q: What’s the difference between a dead dog in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?
A: There are skid marks in front of the dog.

Q: Why won’t sharks attack lawyers?
A: Professional courtesy.

Q: What do you have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?
A: Not enough sand.

Q: Why did God make snakes just before lawyers?
A: To practice.

A command was given to a dog: “SPEAK! ”
The dog said in return: “Not without more...

Whats a snakes favourite flower? Coily-flowers!

Question: Why don't snakes bite attorneys?

Answer:Professional courtesy.

What's a snakes favourite flower? Coily-flowers!

What song to snakes like to sing? Viva Aspana!