Santa Banta Jokes / Recent Jokes
Letter from mother to son Santa Singh. Pyare Puttar, Vahe Guru. I am writing this letter slow, because I know you can`t read fast. We do not live where we did when you left home. Your dad read in the paper that most accidents happen 20 miles from your home, so we moved. I wont be able to send you the address as the last Sardar who stayed here took the numbers with them for their next house, so they would not have to change their address. This place is really nice. It even has a washing machine. I am not sure it works too well. Last week I put 3 shirts, pulled the chain and haven`t seen them since then. The weather here isn`t too bad. It rained only twice last week. The first time it rained 3 days, and the second time for 4 days. The coat you wanted me to send you, your aunt said it would be a little too heavy to send in the mail with all the buttons, so we cut them off and put them in the pocket. We got another bill from the funeral home. It said if we don`t make the last payment on more...
Santa thought he had conquered his problem of trying to remember his wife`s birthday and, also, their anniversary.
He opened an account with a florist, provided that florist with the dates and instructions to send flowers to Jeetoo on these dates along with an appropriate note signed, "Your loving husband."
Jeeto was thrilled by this new display of attention and all went well until one day, some bouquets later, when Santa came home, kissed her and said offhandedly, "Nice flowers, where`d you get them?"
Santa and Banta had just bought two horses. Now the problem was that they could not differenciate between the two horses. So, one day Santa cuts the left ear of his horse, so that it is easy to know that it is his horse. While doing so, an enemy of Santa looks at him. This enemy also cuts the left ear of banta. By doing so santa and banta come in confusion to differenciate. So, next thing santa keeps on cutting his horse`s right ear, then his tail, then makes him blind and so on. And the enemy also kept on doing so with banta`s horse. At last Santa`s horse had no legs left and banta`s horse was with one leg only. The enemy also went and cut banta`s horse one leg. So, in the morning it was the same sitaution, How to diffrenciate thier horses. So, after thinking and putting lots of effort to thier mind - Santa said - O. K You keep the black one and i will keep the white.
Once Santa & Banta were travelling along with their friends Monty & Jaggi. On a road surrounded by forests on both sides, their car was attacked by robbers. Santa & his friends were pulled out of the car. The robbers blasted the car and took Santa, Banta and their friends in the middle of the forest where their boss was residing.
Now, this boss was fond of jokes. So, he put the condition that whoever tells a joke that makes every single person laugh should be left unharmed and alive, but if one single person doesn`t laugh then the joke-teller would be shot to death.
Banta started telling the funniest joke he had ever heard, "One day........." and when he was finished, everybody were falling with laughter except Santa. So according to the vow, the boss shot poor Banta.
Now, it was the turn of Monty. He also told the best joke he had ever heard. Again everybody laughed including the boss & his robbers, but still Santa was quite as a statue. So more...
Banta, “All of the thrill is gone from my marriage. ”
Santa, “Why not add some intrigue to your life and have an affair?"
Banta, “But what if my wife finds out? ”
Santa, “Heck, this is a new age we live in. Go ahead and just tell her about it. ”
Banta goes home to his wife and says, “Preeto, I think an affair will help bring us closer together. ”
Preeto, “Forget it, I’ve already tried that. It didn’t work. ”
One sardu was going to Chandigarh from pune by a air-india plane. He was alloted the middle seat of one of the 3-seats array. But as soon as the sardarji got into the plane, he sat on the window side seat which was actually for an old lady. After some time the old lady came and requested the sardarji to leave the side seat. But the sardaji told:"I want to see the view from the window and shall not leave". The old lady then complained to the air hostess. The air hostess came and requested the sardarji to leave that seat. But sardarji was adament and did not leave. Then the air hostess went and told the asst capt. He also came and requested, but in vain. Finally the Captain came. He whispered something in the ears of the sardarji, and the sardarji immedietly left the side seat and returned to the middle seat. Astonished, the airhostess and the asst. capt. asked the capt afterwards what he told to the sardarji. Capt. told: "nothing. Ijust told him that only the middle more...
Once Santa Singh and Banta Singh were going in a jungle, Suddenly they saw one tiger comming towards them. To save themselves they climbed a tree and both sat on one branch. The tiger came under the tree and sat down. Santa told Banta " Yaar just to pass Time Why don`t you sing some song" Banta Singh started to sing. After singing four songs Banta hanged upside down on the branch and then again sung four songs. After singing all the songs he Banta came back to his original position. Santa asked curiosly "Yaar Bantya, You sung four songs sitting in upright position and next four songs you sat upside down, Why did you do that?" Banta told " Yaar First four songs were from side A and the other four were from Side B".