Rich Jokes / Recent Jokes

There were three men. Joe, Rich, and Scott. They were all camping in the woods, and they knew they had to stop forthenight. Joe suggested they stop where they were right there, a niceclear, wooded area. Rich agreed, but Scott disagreed, because there was nothinginteresting around, only trees. They kept hiking for a little longer, and came across a small clear area, right next to the highway. Both Joe and Rich wanted to saty there becausethere was no stumps, or moss around, and the sounds of the cars couldhelpto put them asleep. Scott said no, because he found a small ant farm 500meters away, and was scared the ants might come, and get them. SO they kept hiking, and finally, they came to the end of the woods, andstepped onto the highway. Scott was mystified, and wanted to sleep rightsmack dab in the middle of the highway. It was interesting, and he wantedto look at all the different liscence plates, as they drove by. Joe andRich were so upset, because, obviously, that was the LAST more...

A gorgeous young woman decided she wanted to get rich quick, so she came up with a plan. She proceeded to find herself a wealthy old man and planned to screw him to death on their wedding night.
The courtship and wedding went off without any problems, even with the more than half-a-century age difference.
On the first night of their honeymoon, she got undressed and waited for him to come out of the bathroom and join her in bed. However, when he did emerge, he had nothing on except a rubber to cover a twelve inch erection, and was carrying a pair of earplugs and a pair of noseplugs.
Fearful that her plan had gone desperately amiss, she asked, "What are those for?"
The old man replied, "There are two things I can't stand... the sound of a woman screaming, and the smell of burning rubber!"

There was a rich guy who had to go on a business trip, so he brought his wife and his three butlers. While at the hotel, he got a call to go to a meeting. Before he went, he stuck a razor up his wifes pussy so he can tell if the butlers tried to sleep with her. When he got back, he told the first butler to pull down his pants. The butler's penis fell off. The same thing happened with the second butler. Then he told the third butler to pull down his pants, but his penis did not fall off. The rich man was shocked, so he asked the butler how he resisted the temptation. The butler tried to answer, but for some reason his tounge was slashed and bloody.

If you want to get rich, why should you keep your mouth shut? Because silence is golden.

Four men are golfing one day. The first man steps up to tee and states boastfully "My son is so rich that he bought his lover a house". The second man steps up to tee and says, "Well, MY son is so rich that he bought his lover a new car". The third man steps up and says, "My son is so wealthy that he bought his lover a whole summer home in Miami." Finally, the fourth man goes to tee and he says, "Well, my son isn't rich and self-made like yours and he's gay, and from what I hear, despite my objections, he has 3 separate lovers and from them he just got a new house, a new car, and a summer home in Miami."

There was a rich guy and a poor guy sitting together in a bar. The poor guy says "Well I must be going because I don't have that much money so I must go" (he stands, ready to leave) The rich guy says "No, sit down and I will buy you more drinks."
Poor guy: "Alright, but just one more, I really have to be getting home. It is my wife and I's anniversary"
Rich guy: "Really? My wife and I's anniversary was last week!"
Poor guy: "what did you get her?"
Rich guy: "I got her a diamond ring and a Mercedes"
Poor guy: "what made you decide to get her those?"
Rich guy: "Oh, I figured that if she didn't like the diamond ring, she could drive it back to the jewelers. So, what did you get your wife?"
Poor guy: "I got her a pair of flip-flops and a dildo"
Rich guy: "What made you decide to get her those?"
Poor guy: I figured that if she didn't like the more...

Rich boy to dinner lady: This bread's horrible! Why can't you make your own bread like the servants do at home?
Dinner lady: Because we don't have the kind of dough that your father makes!