Reminds Jokes / Recent Jokes

A recently divorced woman is walking along the beach contemplating how badlyscrewed she got over the divorce settlement, when she spies a magic lampwashing up onshore. She rubs the lamp, and out pops a magical genie!! The genie notices her anger and lets her vent her troubles to him. As aconsolation, the genie informs that he will give her three wishes. But, hecautions her that because he does not believe in divorce, he will give herex-husband ten times the amount of whatever she wishes. The woman is steaming mad, thinking that this is hardly fair, but she makesher first wish. The first wish was for a billion dollars. The genie grantsher wish and she finds herself sitting in pile of one billion one-dollarbills. The genie then reminds her that her husband is now the recipient of10 billion dollars. The woman can barely contain her anger when she makes her second wish. Thesecond wish was for a beautiful mansion on the shore of her own privatebeach. In an instant it was granted, but the more...

The computer reminds one of Lon Chaney -- it is the machine of a thousand faces.

An entire new strain of viruses has just been uncovered and we wanted to get this information to you as soon as possible. Please share this with others immediately!!
Monica Lewinsky virus…….. Sucks all the memory out of your computer.
Lorena Bobbit virus………. Turns your hard disk into a 3. 5 inch floppy.
Ellen Degeneres virus…….. Your IBM suddenly claims it’s a MAC.
Titanic virus……………. Makes your whole computer go down.
Disney virus…………….. Everything in the computer goes Goofy.
Mike Tyson virus…………. Quits after one byte.
Prozac virus……. Screws up your RAM but your processor doesn’t care.
Woody Allen virus………By-passes the motherboard and turns on daughter card.
Joey Buttafuoco virus…….. Only attacks minor files.
Spice Girl virus…………. Has no real function, but makes a pretty desktop.
Ronald Reagan virus………. Saves your data, but forgets
Dr. Kevorkian more...

AOL reminds me of an old girlfriend. Just when I think the connection has been established, it suddenly says, "Goodbye."

Dolly Parton reminds you of the `Grand Tetons'.