Reach Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    A blonde gets on an airplane and sits down in the first class section. The stewardess tells her she must move to coach because she doesn't have a first class ticket.
    The blonde replies, "I'm blonde, I'm smart and I have a good job and I'm staying in first class until we reach Jamaica".
    The stewardess gets the Head Stewardess who asks the woman to leave and she again responds "I'm blonde, I'm smart, I have a good job and I'm staying in first class until we reach Jamaica".
    The stewardesses don't know what to do because they have to get the rest of the passengers seated to take off, so they get the co-pilot.
    The co-pilot goes up to the blonde and whispers in her ear. She immediately gets up and goes to her seat in the coach section.
    The head stewardess asks the co-pilot what he said to get her to move. The co-pilot replies, "I told her the front half of the airplane wasn't going to Jamaica".

    A mathematician and a physicist agree to a psychological experiment.
    The mathematician is put in a chair in a large empty room and a beautiful naked woman is placed on a bed at the other end of the room.
    The psychologist explains, "You are to remain in your chair. Every five minutes, I will move your chair to a position halfway between its current location and the woman on the bed."
    The mathematician looks at the psychologist in disgust. "What? I'm not going to go through this. You know I'll never reach the bed!" And he gets up and storms out.
    The psychologist makes a note on his clipboard and ushers the physicist in.
    He explains the situation, and the physicist's eyes light up and he starts drooling.
    The psychologist is a bit confused. "Don't you realize that you'll never reach her?"
    The physicist smiles and replied, "Of course! But I'll get close enough for all practical purposes!"

    A blonde gets on an airplane and sits down in the first class section. The stewardess tells her she must move to coach because she doesn't have a first class ticket. The blonde replies, "I'm blonde, I'm smart and I have a good job. I'm staying in first class until we reach Jamaica." The stewardess gets the head stewardess who asks the woman to leave and she says, "I'm blonde, I'm smart, and I have a good job. I'm staying in first class until we reach Jamaica." The stewardesses doesn't know what to do because they have to get the rest of the passengers seated to take off, so they get the copilot. The copilot goes up to the blonde and whispers in her ear. She immediately gets up and goes to her seat in the coach section. The head stewardess asks the copilot what he said to get her to move. The copilot replies, "I told her the front half of the airplane wasn't going to Jamaica."

    Once upon a time, there was a fellow who was down on his luck,
    and as he was looking through the classifieds, he saw an
    intriguing ad offering a ten million dollar reward to the person
    who could find and retrieve, intact, something called a "tis
    bottle."
    Having nothing to lose, he calls the man who placed the ad. "I
    absolutely must have this bottle, and there are only three
    surviving in the world," the wealthy man tells him, "one is in
    the heart of the deepest jungle, one is at the bottom of the
    coldest, darkest sea, and one is at the top of the highest
    mountain. I will pay your expenses for however long it takes to
    bring me one of these bottles, as well as giving you the ten
    million."
    Being an adventurous fellow, he decides to accept the offer.
    First, he gathers a retinue of guides and hunters to go with him
    into the jungle. He studies for months to prepare, and when he
    is more...

    North Korea has tested 6 missiles, with one of them having the potential to reach the USA, mainly California. California? Great! Who cares? Don't bother me. I live in New York. Let me know when they have one that can reach Chicago, cause then it's too close for comfort.

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