Punjabi Jokes / Recent Jokes

Santa (reading from book of facts):
"Do you know that every time I breathe a man dies?"
Banta: "Why don't you use a mouth wash

Teacher: "I killed a person" convert this sentence into future tense.
Santa: The future tense is "You will go to jail".

Once A Lane Of Houses Were Being Demolished So A Person Came To Santa-Banta And Told Them That The Houses Were Being Demolished. On This They Said That Why Should They Worry For That. The Man Told Them That Their House Was Also Being Demolished. To This They Replied That Then Why Should He Worry For That?

Santa walks into a library & says,
"Can I have a burger and coke?"
Librarian, "I'm sorry, this is a library."
Santa whispers, "Can I have a burger & fries?"

There was this Punjabi minister (they do not always have to be sardarji) who, on the eve of his goodwill mission to Birmingham, was advised by his Tamilian secretary:' Sarr, be careful with your pronunciation of English words. Don't say diviyun, it is division, not "tallyviyyun, it is television, not maiyyur, it is measure.' And so on.
The minister made careful note of these tricky words. On arrival at Birmingham airport he was welcomed by the Lord Mayor of the city. The Punjabi minister, extending his hand, said,' How nice to meet you, Lord Measure!'

Santa gets ready, wears his tie and coat; goes out, climbs a tree and sits on the branch regularly.
Banta asks why he does this.
Santa: "I've been promoted as branch manager."

Santa & Banta Met After A Long Time. Santa - So, What Are You Doing Now A Days? Banta - C. A. Santa - You Mean Charted Accountency! Banta - No! Complete Araam.