Profit Jokes

A History of Math Education

Saw this one on a professor's door:
The evolution of mathematics education
during the last 30 years.
1960's
A peasant sells a bag of potatoes for \$10. His costs amount to 4/5 of his
selling price. What is his profit?
1970's
A farmer sells a bag of potatoes for \$10. His costs amount to 4/5 of his
selling price, i.e. \$8. What is his profit?
1970's (New Math)
A farmer exchanges a set P of potatoes with a set M of money. The cardinality
of the set M is equal to \$10 and each element of M is worth \$1. Draw 10 big
dots representing the elements of M.
The set C of production costs is comprised of 2 big dots less than the set M.
Represent C as a subset of M and give the answer to the question: What is the
cardinality of the set of profits? (Draw everything in red).
1980's
A farmer sells a bag of potatoes for \$10. His production costs are \$8 and his
profit is \$2. Underline the word "potatoes" and discuss with your more...

The Ferengi Rules Of Acquisition (incomplete)

#1 Once you have their money... never give it back.
#3 Never pay more for an acquisition than you have to.
#6 Never allow family to stand in the way of opportunity.
#8 Small print leads to large risk.
#9 Opportunity plus instinct equals profit.
#10 Greed is eternal.
#13 Anything worth doing is worth doing for money.
#16 A deal is a deal... until a better one comes along.
#18 A Ferengi without profit is no Ferengi at all.
#19 Satisfaction is not guaranteed.
#21 Never place friendship above profit.
#22 A wise man can hear profit in the wind.
#27 There's nothing more dangerous than an honest business man.
#31 Never make fun of a Ferengi's mother... insult something he cares about instead.
#33 It never hurts to suck up to the boss.
#34 Peace is good for business.
#35 War is good for business.
#41 Profit is it's own more...

The Evolution of a Math Problem

Math 101Last week I purchased a burger at Burger King for \$1.58. The counter girl took my \$2 and I was digging for my change when I pulled 8 cents from my pocket and gave it to her. She stood there, holding the nickel and 3 pennies, while looking at the screen on her register. I sensed her discomfort and tried to tell her to just give me two quarters, but she hailed the manager for help. While he tried to explain the transaction to her, she stood there and cried.Why do I tell you this? Because of the evolution in teaching math since the 1950s:
Teaching Math In 1950A logger sells a truckload of lumber for \$100. His cost of production is 4/5 of the price. What is his profit?
Teaching Math In 1960A logger sells a truckload of lumber for \$100. His cost of production is 4/5 of the price, or \$80. What is his profit?
Teaching Math In 1970A logger sells a truckload of lumber for \$100. His cost of production is \$80. Did he make a profit?
Teaching Math In 1980A logger sells a more...

This is how it goes in the GCC

DUBAI SYSTEM:
You have two cows. You create a website for them and advertise them in all magazines. You create a Cow City or Milk Town for them. You sell off their milk before the cows have even been milked to both legitimate and shady investors who hope to sell the non-existent milk for a 100% profit in two years time. You bring Tiger Woods to milk the cows first to attract attention.
QATAR SYSTEM:
You have two cows. They've been sitting there for decades and no one realizes that cows can produce milk. You see what Dubai is doing; you go crazy and start milking the heck out of the cows in the shortest time possible. Then you realize no one wanted the milk in the first place.
BAHRAIN SYSTEM:
You have two cows. Some high government official steals one, milks it, sells the milk and pockets the profit. The government tells you there is just one cow and not enough milk for the people. The people riot and scream death to the government and carry Iranian flags. The more...

The History of Math

Teaching Math in 1950:
A logger sells a truckload of lumber for \$100.
His cost of production is 4/5 of the price.
What is his profit?
Teaching Math in 1960:
A logger sells a truckload of lumber for \$100.
His cost of production is 4/5 of the price, or \$80.
What is his profit?
Teaching Math in 1970:
A logger exchanges a set "L" of lumber for a set "M" of money. The cardinality of set M is 100. Each element of M is worth one dollar. Make 100 dots representing the elements of the set M. The set C, the cost of production, contains 20 fewer points than set M. Represent the set C as a subset of set M and answer the following question: What is the cardinality of the set "P" of profits?
Teaching Math in 1980:
A logger sells a truckload of lumber for \$100.
His cost of production is \$80 and his profit is \$20.
Your assignment: Underline the number 20.
Teaching Math in 1990:
By cutting down beautiful forest more...