Pregnant Jokes / Recent Jokes

Last year at Christmas time, my mom went to my sister’s house for the
traditional holiday feast.
Knowing how gullible my sister is, my mom decided to play a trick.
She told my sister that she needed something from the store and asked if my
sister wouldn’t mind going out to get it.
When my sister left the house, mom took the turkey out of the oven, removed the
mixed stuffing, stuffed a Cornish hen, and inserted it into the turkey… then
re-stuffed the turkey.
She then placed the bird(s) back into the oven.
When it was time for dinner, my sister pulled the turkey out of the oven and
proceeded to remove the stuffing.
When her serving spoon hit something, she reached in and pulled out the smaller
bird.
With a look of total shock on her face, my mother exclaimed, “Barbara, you’ve
cooked a pregnant bird! ”
At the reality of this horrifying news, my sister started to cry hysterically.
It took the more...

"Give me a sentence about a public servant," said the Mother helping her son at home. The small boy wrote: "The fireman came down the ladder pregnant." The mother took her son aside to correct him. "Don't you know what pregnant means?" she asked. "Sure," said the young boy confidently. "It means' carrying a child.'"

A pregnant Irish woman from Dublin gets in a car accident and falls into a deep coma. Asleep for nearly 6 months, when she wakes up she sees that she is no longer pregnant and frantically asks the doctor about her baby.

The doctor replies,' Ma'am you had twins! a boy and a girl. Your brother from Cork came in and named them.'

The woman thinks to herself,' Oh No, not my brother... he's an idiot!' She asks the doctor,' Well, what's the girl's name?' Denise.'

'Wow, that's not a bad name, I like it! What's the boy's name?'

'Denephew.'

A Ken and Barbie Joke: Why does Barbie never get pregnant? Because Ken always comes in a box!

What's the difference between a light bulb and a pregnant woman?
You can unscrew a light bulb.

Yuppie pregnant women don't go into labor, they go straight into management.

U.S. Lawmaker Says He Is Worried About E-Mail Pregnancy
Citing the case of a woman who claims she got pregnant from e-mail,
an Ohio Democrat called Wednesday for a "chastity chip" for the
Internet. Rep. James Traficant, known for his flamboyant rhetoric,
gave a brief floor speech about a woman named Frances who claimed to
have gotten pregnant through an e-mail exchange with a paramour 1,500
miles away. "That's right - pregnant," he proclaimed, warning of the
dangers of "immaculate reception." He called on Congress to go beyond
"v-chips" that would protect kids from sexual content on the
Internet, saying, "Its time for Congress to act. The computers do not
need a v-chip. The Internet needs a chastity chip."