Prank Jokes / Recent Jokes

I work at the Help Desk at TCU, and as you can imagine the phones are quite busy to say the least.
One day I received this call from one of the students here asking if I had ever fingered someone.
This call totally caught me off guard, and I thought for sure it was a call from one of the fraternities on campus. I asked the student to repeat the question as I was sure I had misunderstood the question. He again asked if I had ever fingered someone.
I then laughed out loud, thinking this was a prank, another "Lets get the Help Desk" type of prank.
I said to the caller, "aren't you getting a little personal"?
He then said, "No, no, this is a command that is used on the VAX system."
Boy did I get egg on my face that time. I did learn a lesson however, never assume the question being asked is how it sounds, as some things do have double meanings.

A red-head, a brunette and a blonde perform a Post Office robbery. They are on the run from the police and they have to ditch their car and go cross country.

They are all getting tired and happen across an old farm with a huge barn. Sneaking inside the barn, they see three old flour sacks. They all hide in separate sacks.

The police enter the barn and upon seeing the sacks, kick the first one containing the redhead. The redhead says "Woof!".

"Nothing in here but a dog sarge" says the constable. "We'd better move on".

They kick the sack containing the brunette. "Miaow!" she says.

"Nothing in here but a cat sarge. Better move on".

They kick the sack containing the blonde and the blonde says "Potatoes!"

This List Includes: * Things you can do with absolutely nothing * Things you can do with very little * Things you can do with another person The amusement potential for each activity is denoted. Things you can do with absolutely nothing * Push your eyes for interesting light show (Amusement Potential: 1-5 minutes) See a variety of blobs, stars and flashes. Try to make out things-is your subconscience trying to send you a message? Can you control what you see by pressing different areas with different forces? Would it be possible to somehow see the same effects on TV? * See how long you can hold your breath (Amusement Potential: 4-20 minutes) Not that much fun, but it sure passes the time. Play with a friend, or try to beat your own personal best. Some tips: hyperventilate before hand, and stay as still as possible. My personal best is 2:00 (exactly). * Try to not think about polar bears (Amusement Potential: 1-5 minutes) This is especially hard, because by trying too much, you more...

Netscape employees found a gigantic blue stage prop in the shape of an' e' in front of their company's front door one recent morning.

The night before, the same 10-by-12-foot stage prop -- which represents the logo for Microsoft's Internet Explorer, or IE, -- was spotted at a Microsoft bash in San Francisco.

Netscape had the last laugh in the prank, though. Netscape employees placed a 12-foot foam likeness of their mascot' Mozilla' -- a green Godzilla-like creature on top of the' e'.

Mozilla held a placard that read:
Netscape -- 72
Microsoft - 18
referring to recent market share data.

When two (ore more) people are working a desks that are put next to each other, switch their telephone cords. With all those cables lying around it will take some time before they find that one out!

Put a peice of onion or a clove of garlic inside the mouthpiece of a phone. Give it some time for it to fester and build up a strong odor. Then call them and keep them on the phone for as long as possible.

It is allways a good habit to lock your computer before heading off for coffee or a smoke. When someone forgets and leaves a Word document or an email open, type a single word somewhere in the text. “f*ck” or so will do nicely. They’ll never notice and send it out.

Get a hold of someone's cell phone and change the greeting banner to say "NO SERVICE". Many cell phones have greeting banners on them that you can personalize to say whatever you want them to and it stays on there when you're not using your phone. Also, when there is no service more...

The Universal Excuse Form is designed to get you out of the trouble that you may have encountered. Whenever there's a multiple choice, pick the one that works best for your situation and use it. You'll be surprised how effective this form can be!
========================================================
Dear
a) Mom
b) Dad
c) love of my life
d) Assistant Principal
e) Local Police Chief,
f) Near & dear friend
Words cannot begin to express how sorry I am that your
a) Car
b) House
c) Pet
d) Espresso maker
e) Left arm
f) Snow Mobile
was severely damaged by my
a) infantile
b) puerile
c) inept
d) comically brilliant but nonetheless sadistic
e) woefully under appreciated prank.
How could I have known that the
a) car
b) jet ski
c) large helium balloon
d) rodent driven sledge
e) Zamboni
f) Ski Doo
I was riding in would go so far out of control? And while it is true that I should more...

What would you have breakfast?
-"Ketchup and Liqueur"
What would you have for Lunch?
-"Ketchup and Liqueur"
What would you have for dinner?
-"Ketchup and Liqueur"
What would you do if you saw a naked woman running down the street?
-"Ketchup and Liqueur"