Policeman Jokes / Recent Jokes
The traffic policeman stopped the car driver for
crossing the traffic signal on a red.
`Didn`t you see the red light?` Growled the policeman.
`Yes i did`, replied the driver, `But I didn`t see you!`
An elderly couple are enjoying an anniversary dinner together in a
small tavern. The husband leans over and asks his wife, "Do you remember the
first time we had sex together over fifty years ago? We went behind this
tavern where you leaned against the fence and I made love to you.
"Yes," she says, I remember it well.
"Ok," he says, "How about taking a stroll round there again and we can do it for old time's sake.
"Oooooooh Henry, you devil, that sounds like a good idea," she answers.
There's a police officer sitting in the next booth listening to all this, and having a chuckle to himself. He thinks, "I've got to see these two old-timers having sex against a fence. I'll just keep an eye on them so there's no trouble." So he follows them.
They walk haltingly along, leaning on each other for support, aided by walking sticks. Finally they get to the back of the tavern and make their way to the more...
Policeman: Do you know how fast you were going? Motorist: No, youre the one with the radar.
A Woman Called The Police Station And Said, “Hello, I Believe You Found A Man’s Body In The River
Yesterday And He Hasn’t Been Identified Yet. ”
“That’s True, Madam – The Policeman Replied. – Why Are You Asking? ”
“My Husband Disappeared Yesterday After Having A Bad Argument With Me And I Haven’t Seen Him
Since. I Wondered If It Could Be Him, ” Cried The Lady.
“Can You Tell Me Anything About Your Husband Which Could Help Us To Identify The Body? ” Asked The
Policeman.
“Yes, Sure – Answered The Lady, - He’s Cross-Eyed And Has A Strong Scottish Accent. ”
A Suspicious Looking Man Was Stopped By A Policeman, Who Opened The Trunk Of His Car And Found
Five Sacks In It.
“What’s In The Sacks? ” Asked The Policeman.
“Dirt” The Man Answered.
The Policeman Checked Them And They Contained Nothing But Dirt. So He Was Allowed To Go.
A Week Later The Policeman Saw The Same Man. He Stopped Him Again, Checked The Trunk Of His Car
And Again Found Nothing But Dirt.
The Same Thing Happened Several Times. The Policeman Was So Frustrated That He Quit And Became A
Bartender.
One Night The Suspicious-Looking Man Entered His Bar And The Former Policeman Hurried Over To Him
And Said, “Listen, The Drinks Are On The House Tonight If You Tell Me What You Were Stealing All That
Time. ”
The Man Laughed And Answered, “Cars. ”
A policeman bitten by a dog came for treatment to the Safdarjang Hospital. He asked the pharmacist, "Arey bhai! Kuttey katne kee davaa dena - brother give me medicine for dog bite."
The pharmacist asked him, "Santree jee! Aap ko bhee kuttey nay kaat liya - how did a dog bite a policeman?"
The constable replied, "To tell you the truth, I was not wearing my uniform at the time."