Old Jokes / Recent Jokes

Two guys were hiking in the mountains when they came across an old mine shaft going straight down into the ground.
"Wow," said the first guy. "I wonder how deep it is?"
"I dunno," said the second.
"Let's find out." With that, he dropped a rock down the hole.   They waitedand waited, but didn't hear it hit bottom.
"Hmm. Let's try a bigger rock," said the first guy, and tossed a watermelon-sized stone down the hole. They waited a couple of minutes, but didn't hear it hit either. So, they looked around for something bigger to throw down and came across an old railroad tie, which they lifted together and dumped down the hole. Then suddenly, as they waited to hear it hit, a goat streaked between the two of them and jumped straight down the mineshaft.
While they stood there scratching their heads in amazement, a third guy came up the path and asked them if they'd seen a goat.
"Yeah, just now," said more...

May your trouble be like the old man's teeth...few and far between.

A young man and an old man were fishing on a pier. The young man started telling the old one that the night before he caught a trout that was over 3 1/2 foot long.
The old man replied "Oh yea, well I was here 2 nights ago and I hooked something huge. After a 30 minute fight I finaly got it up and it was an old lantern and the thing was still lit."
The young man said "Your lying. I can't believe that."
Then the old man said "I'll tell you what, you knock a couple of foot off your trout and I'll blow out my lantern."

Old Man: Putar mere dand (teeth) lai ke aa. Putar: Bapu roti te bani nahi hai. Old Man: Roti nahi khani, sahmne vali buddhi nu smile deni hai.

At a nursing home in Florida, a group of senior citizens were sitting around talking about their aches and pains.
"My arms are so weak I can hardly lift this cup of coffee," said one.
"I know what you mean. My cataracts are so bad I can't even see my coffee," replied another.
"I can't turn my head because of the arthritis in my neck," said a third.
"My blood pressure pills make me dizzy," another contributed.
"I guess that's the price we pay for getting old," winced an old man.
Then there was a short moment of silence.
"Thank God we can all still drive," said one woman cheerfully.

A decorated war veteran, fresh off the bus, is looking for a place to stay. He hears that room and board is available from the three old spinsters at the edge of town, but is advised they are very picky in letting strangers stay there. He decides to chance it, and limps on up to the front door. His knock is answered by Gladys. "What do you want, sonny?" she asks him."Ma'am, I'm just looking for a hot meal and a room for the night," heanswers. The other two old spinsters gather around the door. "Who's out there? Does he look decent?" they ask. Gladys says, "It's a soldier, and he's got a Purple Heart on."The other two spinsters giggle and say, "The hell with what color it is... let him in!"

once there was a guy name amden walking down the road.. he was passing by a house and all of a sudden a used condom landed on his head.. he grab the condom and saw a open window in the 2nd floor of that house he was so pissed brab the condom went to the house and knock on the door,.. a old man came and answer the door
amden grab the condom and questioned the old man "who's living upstairs" the old man replied my only son and his newly married wife.. why.? amden replied ohh here your son threw away your grand son and gave the condom...