Object Jokes / Recent Jokes

An Arab has spent many days crossing the desert without finding a source of
water. It gets so bad that his camel dies of thirst. He's crawling through the
sands, certain that he has breathed his last, when all of a sudden he sees a
shiny object sticking out of the sand several yards ahead of him.
He crawls to the object, pulls it out of the sand, and discovers that he has
a Manischevitz wine bottle. It appears that there may be a drop or two left in
the bottle, so he unscrews the top and out pops a genie. But, this is no
ordinary genie. This genie appears to be a Hassidic rabbi, complete with black
alpaca coat, black hat, side curls, etc.
"Well, kid," says the genie. "You know how it works. You have three wishes."
"I'm not going to trust you," says the Arab. "I'm not going to trust a Jewish
genie!"
"What do you have to lose? It looks like you're a goner anyway!" The Arab
thinks about more...

Any small object when dropped will hide under a larger object.

A blonde woman walks into a store. Curious about a shiny object, she asks, "What is that?"
The store clerk responds, "It's a thermos."
The blonde then asks, "What does it do?"
The clerk says "It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold." So she buys one.
The next day, she brings it to work with her. Her boss, also a blond, asks, "What is that shiny object?"
She replies "It's a thermos."
He asks, "What does it do?"
She says, "It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold."
He then asks, "What do you have in there?"
"Two cups of coffee and a popsicle."

Q. What is the difference between an abstract class and interface?
A. Terms are different. .. Nothing more.

Q. What is jfc?
A. Jilebi, fanta & coffee.

Q. Explain 2 tier and 3 -tier architecture?
A. Two wheelers like scooters will have 2 tyres and autorickshaws will have 3 tyres.

Q. I want to store more than 10 objects in a remote server? Which methodoly will follow?
A. Send it through courier.

Q. Can i modify an object in corba?
A. As you wish, i do not have any objections.

Q. How to communicate 2 threads each other?
A. Non living things can't communicate.

Q. What is meant by flickering?
A. Closing and opening of eyes at girls.

Q. Explain rmi architecture?
A. I am a computer professional not an architect student.

Q. What is the use of servlets?
A. In hotels, they can replace servers.

Q. What is the dif ference between process and more...

Oral Sex Oral Argument Will the justices know it when they see it?

'But Ginsburg suggested Lewinsky may say she and Clinton engaged in an act other than intercourse.' What's the president's definition of sex?' he asked in an interview minutes after Clinton's statement.'

--USA Today, Jan. 27, 1998

Justice O'Connor: I am trying to get my mind around this theory, Counselor.

Mr. Bennett: Yes, Your Honor.

Justice O'Connor: You say it was not sex? Though the affidavit and counsel all attest that she. .. did as the affidavit attests?

Mr. Bennett: Your honor, we are proposing that not everything that looks like sex is sex and that some things that do not look like sex are in fact sex. To me, ministering to a person's toes in a particular way does not look like sex, but I am reliably told it is sex. On the other hand, say you visit your doctor and your doctor fingers your anatomy, to find lumps or sores or whatever. That's not more...

Gold’s Law: If the shoe fits, it’s ugly
Goldenstern’s Rules: 1. Always hire a rich attorney. 2. Never buy from a rich salesman.
Golden Rule Of Arts And Sciences: Whoever has the gold makes the rules.
Gordian Maxim: If a string has one end, it has another.
Gordon’s First Law: If a research project is not worth doing at all, it is not worth doing well.
Gordon’s Object Lifespan Theorem: No matter the amount of care given the purchased object, it will fuse/explode/disassemble within three days of warranty expiration.
Gordon’s Warranty Law: All warranty clauses expires upon bill payment.

Galbraith’s Law of Human Nature: Faced with the choice between changing one’s mind and proving that there is no need to do so, almost everybody gets busy on the proof.
Gerrold’s Laws of Infernal Dynamics: 1. An object in motion will always be headed in the wrong direction. 2. An object at rest will always be in the wrong place. 3. The energy required to change either one of these states will always be more than you wish to expend, but never so much as to make the task totally impossible.
Gilb’s Laws Of Unreliability: 1) At the source of every error which is blamed on the computer you will find at least two human errors, including the error of blaming it on the computer. 2) Any system which depends on human reliability is unreliable. 3) Udetectable errors are infinite in variety, in contrast to detectable errors, which by definition are limited. 4) Investment in reliability will increase until it exceeds the probable cost of errors, or until someone insists on getting more...