Moustache Jokes / Recent Jokes
There was this Scottish guy, all dressed up in his kilt etc. sitting in a bar and he was a bit strapped for cash. He was trying to work out how to solve his problem when this guy with a big cigar and a moustache came in. He watched the guy order a whole heap of alcohol. When the bartender asked him to pay he just said, “Charge it to the Arafat account.” Now after this, several guys who looked the same came in and bought a whole heap of alcohol, charging it to the Arafat account.
Well, the Scotsman had thought long and hard and decided it was worth a try, so he went to the bartender, ordered his alcohol then said charge it to the Arafat account. Well the barman looked at him and said, “Sorry I can’t do that.” The Scotsman was surprised and said, “But you gave it to all those other guys.”
The barman replied, “Well, those guys had a big moustache and a cigar in their mouths.” So the Scotsman promptly whipped up his kilt and said, “Yeah, well so do more...
ONCE upon a time there was a rich zamindar who liked to end his day by taking a bowl of whipped cream malaee before retiring tor the night. He had a servant whose job was to get three annas' worth of malaee from a halwaae every evening. He became suspicious of this servant's honesty and engaged another to keep a watch over the fellow. The two servants came to an understanding. Instead of buying two annas' worth and pocketing one anna, they began to buy one anna's worth for their master and dividing the other two between themselves.
After some days the zamindar smelt collusion and hired a third servant to keep a watch on the other two. This time the three of them came to an understanding whereby they divided the three annas between themselves. At night they smeared their master's moustache with white paint. Next morning the zamindar spoke angrily to his servants, "I got no malaee last night. Why?" The servants protested that he had and showed him a mirror which showed more...
A man with a moustache may never kiss a woman in public.(Iowa Dumb Laws)
There was a shortage of rice in Sri Lanka some years ago. Well to do and the able were the selected crowd did enjoyed this luxary. Most others just pretended that they too enjoy the same. Our Village Headman was one of them. As numerous ones visit him rgularly he made it a point to impress them that he is defenitely one who is blessed with this luxary. So every time when some one visit him he apply some cooked grains of rice on his moustache and come forward to impress that he had just enjoyed a good meal of rice.
Once a group of villagers droped in, on some kind of complains. As usual he came forward to meet the group with' rice attachment on his moustache.'
Right then his young son came running to the front of the house and said, "Thaathea, Thaathea that coconut shell you keep rice to place on your moustache before meeting people who come here was knocked by the cat and they are all now coward with ash near the fire place.
An angry mob is walking along the street. Someone yells, "Hey, let's hang that guy with a moustache!"
Someone else yells, "Nah, let's use a rope!"
In Alabama it is ILLEGAL to wear a fake moustache that causes laughter in church!
Three mustaches walk into a bar.
The first mustache says, “I’m lonely, could I have a drink made of something other than mustache?” The bartender gives him a drink made entirely of the hair from a sideburn. The first mustache says, “Wow, that’s delicious.”
The second mustache says, “I’m tired, can I have a drink made of something other than face-hair?” The bartender gives him a drink made entirely of the hair off the top of his head. The second mustache says, “Thanks, this is terrific head hair.”
The third mustache says to the bartender, “I’m bored, can I have a drink made of something other than boredom?” The bartender gives him a drink made of mustache. The third mustache says, “What’s this? I’m not a cannibal!” And the bartender says, “Well you look like a mustache to me.”