Mount Jokes / Recent Jokes

On what should you mount a statue of your cat? A caterpillar!

The following is a "history" collected by teachers throughout the United States, from eighth grade through college level. Read carefully, and you will learn a lot of incorrect information.

The inhabitants of ancient Egypt were called mummies. They lived in the Sarah Dessert and traveled by Camelot. The climate of the Sarah is such that the inhabitants have to live elsewhere, so areas of the dessert are cultivated by irritation. The Egyptians built the Pyramids in the shape of a huge triangular cube. The Pyramids are a range of mountains between France and Spain.

The Bible is full of interesting caricatures. In the first book of the Bible, Guinesses, Adam and Eve were created from an apple tree. On of their children, Cain, once asked, "Am I my brother`s son?" God asked Abraham to sacrifice Isaac on Mount Montezuma. Jacob, son of Isaac, stole his brother`s birth mark. Jacob was a patriarch who brought up his twelve sons to be patriarchs, but more...

"What happened to the Pope when he went to Mount Olive?" "Popeye beat the shit out of him!"

A little old woman called Mount Sinai Hospital. She said, "Mount Sinai Hospital? Hello. Darling, I'd like to talk with the person who gives the information about the patients. But I don't want to know if the patient is better or doing like expected, or worse, I want all the information from top to bottom, from A to Z."The voice on the other end of the line said, "Would you hold the line, please, that's a very unusual request?"Then a very authoritative voice came on and said, "Are you the lady who is calling about one of the patients?"She said, "Yes, darling! I'd like to know the information about Sarah Finkel, in room 302."He said, "Finkel. Finkel. Let me see. Feinberg, Farber - Finkel. Oh yes, Mrs. Finkel is doing very well. In fact, she's had two full meals, her doctor says if she continues improving as she is, he is going to send her home Tuesday at twelve o'clock."The woman said, "Thank God! That's wonderful! She's going home more...

A little woman called Mount Sinai Hospital. She said, "Mount Sinai Hospital? Hello. Darling, I'd like to talk with the person who gives the information about the patients. But I don't want to know if the patient is better or doing like expected, or worse, I want all the information from top to bottom, from A to Z."The voice on the other end of the line said, "Would you hold the line, please, that's a very unusual request."Finally a very authoritative voice came on and said, "Are you the lady who is calling about one of the patients?"She said, "Yes, darling! I'd like to know the information about Sarah Finkel, in Room 302."He said, "Finkel. Finkel. Let me see. Feinberg, Farber-Finkel. Oh yes. Mrs. Finkel is doing very well. In fact, she's had two full meals, her blood pressure is fine, and if she continues this way, her doctor is going to send her home Tuesday at twelve o'clock."The woman said, "Thank God! That's wonderful! She's more...

The Irish attempt on Mount Everest was a valiant effort, but it failed:
They ran out of scaffolding.

What happened to the Pope when he visited Mount Olive? - Popeye almost killed him.