Merely Jokes / Recent Jokes

A guy with a black eye boards a plane bound for Pittsburg and immediately notices that the guy seated next to him has a black eye as well. "What a coincidence," he says to him. "We both have a black eye. Mind if I ask how you got yours?"
"Well, it just sort of happened," the second guy answers. "It was merely a Freudian slip. See, I was at the ticket counter and this gorgeous blonde with the biggest breasts I've ever seen was behind the counter. Instead of saying I'd like a ticket to Pittsburg, I said I'd like a ticket to Titsburgh. That's when she socked me one."
"Mine was merely a Freudian slip too," replies the first guy. "I was at the breakfast table and wanted to say to my wife, 'Please pour me a bowl of cereal'. Accidentally I said, 'You ruined my life you fucking bitch'."

Depression is merely anger without the enthusiasm.

Happiness is merely the remission of pain.

Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

Time is merely a waste of reality.