Lawmaker Jokes / Recent Jokes

U.S. Lawmaker Says He Is Worried About E-Mail Pregnancy
Citing the case of a woman who claims she got pregnant from e-mail,
an Ohio Democrat called Wednesday for a "chastity chip" for the
Internet. Rep. James Traficant, known for his flamboyant rhetoric,
gave a brief floor speech about a woman named Frances who claimed to
have gotten pregnant through an e-mail exchange with a paramour 1,500
miles away. "That's right - pregnant," he proclaimed, warning of the
dangers of "immaculate reception." He called on Congress to go beyond
"v-chips" that would protect kids from sexual content on the
Internet, saying, "Its time for Congress to act. The computers do not
need a v-chip. The Internet needs a chastity chip."

Who says nothing interesting ever takes place in these hallowed halls?
Women legislators joined the fray at a June 1994 session of Taiwan's National Assembly, screaming, trading slaps and kicks, and pulling each other's hair.
The violence began when two members of the ruling Nationalist Party poked fun at opposition lawmaker Su Chih-yang after her underwear showed when she sat down.
Nationalist lawmaker Kuo Su-chun berated Su, saying "As a woman you should also review your own behavior."
Accusing Kuo of insinuating that she sat immodestly, Su walked to the podium and slapped her. Four other women joined the fracas, and a fifth collapsed from high blood pressure when she tried to stop it.

Exerpted from the book "Dumb, Dumber, Dumbest: True News of the World's Least Competent People,"(c) 1996 by John J Kohut and Roland Sweet
Women legislators joined the fray at a June 1994 session of Taiwan's National Assembly, screaming, trading slaps and kicks, and pulling each other's hair.
The violence began when two members of the ruling Nationalist Party poked fun at opposition lawmaker Su Chih-yang after her underwear showed when she sat down.
Nationalist lawmaker Kuo Su-chun berated Su, saying "As a woman you should also review your own behavior."
Accusing Kuo of insinuating that she sat immodestly, Su walked to the podium and slapped her. Four other women joined the fracas, and a fifth collapsed from high blood pressure when she tried to stop it.

For thirty Years I have been a Travel Agent, serving our legislators and their staffs. This is how I know we're in trouble!
I had a New Hampshire Congresswoman ask for an aisle seat on the plane, so that her hair wouldn't get messed up by being near the window.
I got a call from a candidate's staffer, who wanted to go to Capetown. I started to explain the length of the flight and the passport information. Then she interrupted me with, "I'm not trying to make you look stupid, but Capetown is in Massachusetts." Without trying to make her look like the stupid one, I calmly explained, "Cape Cod is in Massachusetts, Capetown is in Africa." Her response. (click).
A senior Vermont Congressman called, furious about a Florida package we did. I asked what was wrong with the vacation in Orlando. He said he was expecting an ocean-view room. I tried to explain that is not possible, since Orlando is in the middle of the state. He replied, "Don't lie to me, I more...