Kirk Jokes / Recent Jokes

Captain Kirk and an away team, searching for intelligent life on other planets, traveled down to Earth after going through a time disturbance cloud, landing in Washington D.C. right in the middle of Clinton's inaugural ball.
After looking around, Kirk says: "Beam us up, Scotty. There's no intelligent life down on this one."

Host of "Legends of the Hidden Temple"...Did anyone remember his name before seeing this photo? (If you are Kirk Fogg your response doesn't count)

Captain Kirk and an away team, searching for intelligent life on other planets, traveled down to Earth after going through a time disturbance cloud, landing in Washington D. C. right in the middle of Clinton's inaugural ball.
After looking around, Kirk says: "Beam us up, Scotty. There's no intelligent life down on this one."

Kirk,
your prayers were not answered! As expected 49ers bit the crap out of the Chargers. Maybe if you start praying now, by next year, god might pitty you.
Now a question?
Assumption:
If a game is played in one and only one country. And they have a tournament. for all the teams in that country, I believe it would be called National Championship!
Question:
Then why the heck are the Superbowl Champions called World Champions?
Last I heard, there are many more countries in the world, besides USA. Shouldn't another country, heck even CANADA would do be involved for it to be called the WORLD CHAMPIONSHIP.
Any takers???
KIRK???

Fifty Ways to Kill an Ensign
(Lyrics: Joel Polowin. Music: Paul Simon's "50 Ways to Leave Your Lover")
The problem is something 'bout your clothes, she said to me
The red shirt and the stripeless sleeves yell, "I'm Security!"
And when you get down planet-side with Kirk, you'll get to see
There must be fifty ways to kill an ensign
He takes a landing party down to find what's going on
A couple of the bridge crew, and some extras come along
And then before you know it - the 'expendables' are gone
There must be fifty ways to kill an ensign
Fifty ways to kill an ensign
Just step on a rock, Jock
Get thorns from some plants, Lance
A Horta can spray, Ray
Just listen to me
Clouds drink up your blood, Bud
Computers can kill, Bill
You could lose all your salt, Walt
Kirk gets away free...
She said it grieves me so to see you with such nerves
Not ev'ryone who goes with Kirk will suffer from this more...

Why did Captain Kirk pee on the ceiling?

To go where no man had gone before.

Captain Kirk and an away team, searching for intelligent life on other planets, traveled down to Earth after going through a time disturbance cloud, landing in Washington D. C. right in the middle of Clinton`s inaugural ball.

After looking around, Kirk says: "Beam us up, Scotty. There`s no intelligent life down on this one."