Jump Jokes / Recent Jokes

one day sally was jumping on railroad tracks saying 21, 21, 21 then she sees a blonde and asks if she wants to jump with her and the blonde said sure so they are jumping and saying 21, 21, 21 and a train starts to come and sally jumps off and the blonde continues to jump the train kills her and then sally gets up and starts jumping again an is saying 22, 22, 22.
by Stephen R.

Why did the cow jump over the moon? To get to the Milky Way!

Halfway thru bootcamp the hairlip calls home to his buddy. Man this is tough, the drill seargent took three of us way up in a plane.He opened the door and told the first guy JUMP! and the guy did. He grabbed the next guy and said JUMP! and he did.He looked at me and said JUMP! I told him no i just can't. He pulled out his big thang and said, you jump or i'm gonna screw you with this. My goodness said his buddy, did you jump? Well yeah said the hairlip, a little bit right at first.

A blonde and a brunette were watching the 11:00 pm news. The current
news story was about a man up on a ledge and threatening to jump, when the station cuts to a commercial.
Brunette: I bet you $20 he's going to jump.
Blonde: OK.
(Back to newscast: He jumped!)
Blonde: OK. I lost. Here's my $20 to you.
Brunette: No, that was too easy. I can't take it.
Blonde: I insist. I lost.
Brunette: I have a confession to make. I saw the same thing on the
6:00pm news and I knew he jumped. So it wasn't really a good bet.
Blonde: I know. I saw the same newscast at 6 too. But I didn't think he would be stupid enough to jump TWICE!.

A blonde and a brunette were watching the 11:00pm news. The current news story was about a man up on a ledge and threatening to jump, when the station cuts to a commercial.
Brunette: I bet you $20 he's going to jump.
Blonde: OK.
(Back to newscast: He jumped!)
Blonde: OK. I lost. Here's my $20 to you.
Brunette: No, that was too easy. I can't take it.
Blonde: I insist. I lost.
Brunette: I have a confession to make. I saw the same thing on the 6:00 p.m. news and I knew he jumped. So it wasn't really a good bet.
Blonde: I know, I saw the same newscast at 6 too. But I didn't think he'd be stupid enough to jump TWICE!

A young soldier was making his first parachute jump.The corporal explained the procedure "You count toten and pull the first ripcord. If the chute doesn'topen, pull the second. That should do it. Then, afteryou land, there'll be a truck waiting to pick you up."The soldier checked his gear, called out the customary"Geronimo!" and jumped out of the plane. He counted toten and pulled the ripcord. The chute failed to open.He pulled the second ripcord and the chute still didn'topen. As he plummeted downward, he said, "I'll bet thatgoddamn truck won't be there either!"

A young man joins the Air Force. He writes his father, saying that he is really frightened about the upcoming parachute exercises. A few months later he gets leave and goes home.
His father askes, "So, how did the parachute jump go, Son?".
Son replies, "Well, Dad, it came time for me to jump and I froze at the door. My drill Sgt. comes up behind me. He is a really big tough guy. He said to me that I had to either jump out of the plane or he was going to "do me" with his 12 incher!"
Father says, "Well, Son, did you jump?".
"Just a little at first", said the son.