Incompetence Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    To All Employees: It has come to our attention recently that many of you have been turning in timecards that specify large amounts of "Miscellaneous Unproductive Time" (Code 5309). Note that unproductive time isn't a problem.What is a problem, however, is not knowing exactly what you are doing during your unproductive time. Attached below is a sheet specifying a tentative extended job code list based on our observations of employee activities.The list will allow you to specify with a fair amount of precision what you are doing during your unproductive time. Please begin using this job code list immediately and let us know about any difficulties you encounter. Thank you, Accounting. Attached: Extended Job Code ListCode Number Explanation
    --- 5316 Useless Meeting 5317 Obstructing Communications at Meeting 5318 Trying to Sound Knowledgeable While in Meeting 5319 Waiting for Break 5320 Waiting for Lunch 5321 Waiting for End of Day 5322 Vicious Verbal Attacks Directed at more...

    To All Employees: It has come to our attention recently that many of you have been turning in timecards that specify large amounts of "Miscellaneous Unproductive Time" (Code 5309). Note that unproductive time isn't a problem. What is a problem, however, is not knowing exactly what you are doing during your unproductive time. Attached below is a sheet specifying a tentative extended job code list based on our observations of employee activities. The list will allow you to specify with a fair amount of precision what you are doing during your unproductive time. Please begin using this job code list immediately and let us know about any difficulties you encounter. Thank you, Accounting. Attached: Extended Job Code ListCode Number Explanation ---------- ----------- 5316 Useless Meeting 5317 Obstructing Communications at Meeting 5318 Trying to Sound Knowledgeable While in Meeting 5319 Waiting for Break 5320 Waiting for Lunch 5321 Waiting for End of Day 5322 Vicious Verbal Attacks more...

    It has come to my attention recently that many people have been turning
    in timesheets that specify large amounts of "Miscellaneous Unproductive
    Time" (code 5300). To our department, unproductive time isn't a problem.
    What is a problem is not knowing exactly what people are doing during
    their unproductive time.
    I've attached a sheet specifying a tentative extended job list based on
    my observations of employee activities. The list will allow you to specify
    with a fair amount of precision what you are doing during your unproductive
    time. Please distribute this as necessary, and let me know about any
    difficulties.
    For your timesheets:
    Job number Explanation
    ---
    5300 Meeting
    5300-100 Obstructing Communications at Meeting
    5300-200 Trying to Sound Knowledgeable While in Meeting
    5310 Breaks
    5310-100 Waiting for Break
    5310-110 Buying Snack
    5310-120 Eating Snack
    5310-200 Waiting for Lunch
    5310-210 more...

    In every work of genius we recognize our rejected thoughts.
    In order to get a loan, you must first prove you don't need it.
    In spite of all evidence to the contrary, the entire universe is composed of only two basic substances: magic and lies.
    In the fight between you and the world, back the world.
    Incompetence is a double-edged banana.
    Influence is like a savings account. The less you use it, the more you've got. - Andrew Young, American politician
    Inspiration and perspiration are related by more than rhyme.
    Intelligence is a tool to be used towards a goal, and goals are not always chosen intelligently. - Larry Niven' Protector'
    Interchangable parts won't.
    Incompetence knows no barriers of time or place.
    It may be that your whole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.

    To All Employees: It has come to our attention recently that many of you have been turning in timecards that specify large amounts of "Miscellaneous Unproductive Time" (Code 5309). Note that unproductive time isn't a problem.
    What is a problem, however, is not knowing exactly what you are doing during your unproductive time. Attached below is a sheet specifying a tentative extended job code list based on our observations of employee activities.
    The list will allow you to specify with a fair amount of precision what you are doing during your unproductive time. Please begin using this job code list immediately and let us know about any difficulties you encounter. Thank you, Accounting. Attached: Extended Job Code List
    Code Number Explanation
    ---
    5316 Useless Meeting
    5317 Obstructing Communications at Meeting
    5318 Trying to Sound Knowledgeable While in Meeting
    5319 Waiting for Break
    5320 Waiting for Lunch
    5321 Waiting for End of more...

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