Hacked Jokes / Recent Jokes

Finally, Serbian hackers hacked the navigation systems of "Tomahawk" missiles - now they're called "Boomerang."

A woman driver is pulled over by a policeman:
Woman: Is there a problem, Officer?
Officer: Ma'am, you were speeding.
Woman: Oh, I see.
Officer: Can I see your license please?
Woman: I'd give it to you but I don't have one.
Officer: Don't have one?
Woman: Lost it four times for drunk driving.
Officer: I see... Can I see your vehicle registration papers please?
Woman: I can't do that.
Officer: Why not?
Woman: I stole this car.
Officer: Stole it?
Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.
Officer: You what?
Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see.
The Officer looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.
Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please!
The woman steps out of her vehicle.
Woman: Is more...

One morning, a foursome of men were waiting at the men's tee, while another foursome of ladies were hitting from the ladies' tee.
The ladies were really taking their sweet time. Finally, when the last woman was ready to hit the ball, she hacked it about ten feet, then went over to the ball and hacked it another ten feet or so.
She looked up at the men, who are watching, and said apologetically, "I guess all those f***ing lessons I took this winter didn't help."
One of the men immediately replied, "Now, you see that is your problem. You should have taken' golf lessons' instead."

An old lady gets pulled over for speeding...
Old Lady: Is there a problem, Officer?
Officer: Ma'am, you were speeding.
Old Lady: Oh, I see.
Officer: Can I see your license please?
Old Lady: I'd give it to you but I don't have one.
Officer: Don't have one?
Old Lady: Lost it, 4 years ago for drunk driving.
Officer: I see. .. Can I see your vehicle registration
papers, please?
Old Lady: I can't do that.
Officer: Why not?
Old Lady: I stole this car.
Officer: Sto! le it?
Old Lady: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner & got
Officer: You what?
Old Lady: His body parts are in plastic bags in the
trunk if you want to see.
The Officer looks at the woman and slowly backs away
to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes 5
police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly
approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.
Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your more...

Finally, Serbian hackers hacked the navigation systems of "Tomahawk" missiles -- now they're called "Boomerang."