Grapes Jokes / Recent Jokes

A duck walks into a bar, sits down at the barstool, and waits for the bartender. The bartender walks up, hands the duck a menu, waits a while, and comes back to take his order. "What'll it be?" the bartender says. The duck says, "I think I'll have the grapes." "Well, I'm sorry sir, but this is a bar, we don't serve grapes here. Now, I'll let you look a bit longer and wave when you know what you want." The duck looks at the menu, then waves the bartender down. "Ok, you got your order?" The duck nods, saying, "I'll think I'll have the grapes." The bartender, kind of peeved from the duck, says, "Look Mac, we don't have any grapes here. This is a bar. We don't serve grapes, so what will you have?!" The duck looks at him in the eyes and says, "I'll have the grapes." The bartender, enraged, shouts, "If you ask for the grapes one more time I'm going to nail your feathered a** to the barstool!!" The bartender more...

Q: What is the difference between grapes and a viola?
A: You take off your shoes to stamp on grapes.

So a duck walks into a bar hops up onto a stool and says, "got any grapes?" and the bartender says, "No we only sell beer and whiskey and stuff like that." so the duck leaves. The next day the duck walks into the bar and says, "Got any grapes?" and the bartender said, "I already told you NO now get out of here if you come back and ask me that question again I will nail your beak to the bar!" so again the duck leaves and comes back the next day hops up on the stool and says, "Got any nails?" and the bartender said, "No why?" and the duck says, "Got any grapes!"

A duck walked into a store one day and asked the clerk, "Do you have any grapes?" The clerk said, "No." So the duck walked out and came back the next day and said, "You got any grapes?" and the clerk said, "No." So the duck walked out and came in next time and said, "You got any grapes?" and the clerk said, "No, and if you come in again and ask if we have any grapes, I'll staple your feet to the floor." So the duck walked out and came in again and said, "You got any staples?" the clerk said, "No..." so the duck said, "You got any grapes?

a duck walks into a bar and asks the bartender
"
do you got any grapes?"
the bartender looks up and says "
no"
the duck comes into the bar the next day and asks again
"
do ya got any grapes?"
the bartender again says "
no"
the duck comes into the bar again and asks once more
"
do you got any grapes?"
the bartender gets outraged and says
"
if you ask me that again i'll nail your feet to the floor!!"
so the duck comes in the next day and asks
"
doyou got any nails?"
the bartender says "
no"
so the duk asks
"
do ya got any grapes?"

A duck walks into a bar and asks the bartender if he has any grapes. The bartender replies that he doesn't have any grapes.
The next day the duck walks into the same bar and again asks the bartender if he has any grapes, and again the bartender tells him that he doesn't.
This goes on for a week, until the frustrated bartender warns the duck that if he asks that stupid question one more time, he's going to staple the duck's bill closed.
The next day the duck walks into the bar and asks the bartender, "Do you have any staples?" The bartender says, "No." So the duck says, "Good. In that case, do you have any grapes?"

This duck walks into a bar and asks the bartender, "Do you have any grapes?"
The bartender says no, and the duck leaves.
The next day, the duck returns and asks, "Do you have any grapes?" The bartender again says no, and the duck leaves.
Two days later the duck returns walks up to the bar and asks the bartender, "Do you have any grapes?"
The bartender, losing his patience, screams at the duck, "I told you duck, I don't have any grapes and if you ask me again I will nail your feet to the floor!!"
The duck looked startled and leaves.
Two days later the duck returns walks up to the bar and asks the bartender, "Do you have any nails?"
The bartender replied, "No," and the duck said, "Good! Got any grapes?"