Draft Jokes

Buenos Aires (SatireWire.com) — In an effort to fill its depleting ranks of potential leaders, Argentina's Congress today implemented a nationwide draft that requires all citizens age 18 and over to serve as the country's president for a minimum of two days.
Implementation of the presidential draft is expected to reduce turnover in the position by 50 percent. The decision, however, caused violent unrest in the country of 39 million, as hordes of potential conscripts protested outside government offices.
"I love my country, but it is not fair to ask me to sacrifice my future to serve as president," said 19-year-old Manuel Rodriguez, whose low draft number, 0434, makes it likely he will be called up sometime in early 2005.
The nation's mothers, meanwhile, joined in the protests. "Please do not take my baby away!" cried Maria Esconvida, a housewife from Cordoba. "Take me instead!"
Congressional leaders quickly swore her in before she could more...

An englshman, american, and a canadian went to a pub for a beer. When the draft was delivered they each noticed a fly floating on top. The englishman pushed his draft away in disgust. "Bloody hell, I cannot drink such a mess!" The american shrugged and picked the fly out of his beer. He then proceeded to drink it. The canadian was very disturbed. He picked the fly up, shaking it and yelled, "Spit it out you bastard! Spit it out!"

A bear walks into a bar and says to the bartender ” Bartender give me a ice cold draft beer. The bartender says ” I’m sorry sir but its against company policy to serve bear beer in the bar. ” The bear becomes upset and says “let me talk with the manager”. The manager says to the bear ” may I help you? The bear says yes, ” I would like a ice cold draft beer”. The manager says ” I’m sorry sir but we can not serve bear beer in the bar. The bear is pissed and says to the manager “if you don’t serve me I will eat that young lady at the end of the bar alive”.
The manager says suit yourself. So the bear gets off his chair and proceeds to eat the lady alive, a few seconds go by and police arrive and tell the bear he is under arrest. The bear shouts “under what charge: The police tell him drugs. Drugs the bear says? The police says “that was a barbitch u ate….

The NFL is considering airing the first round of the 2010 draft in primetime. With any luck, the 2009 draft will be over by then.

Draft beer, not people!