Dorm Jokes / Recent Jokes

Q: How do you get an UConn cheerleader into your dorm room?
A: Grease her hips and push.

There was a man sitting at a bar, and he looks over at the gentleman sitting next to him and says, “Hey, you look familiar. Are you from around here? ”
The man answers, “Yeah, I live down the street. ”
“No kidding? ” says the first man, “Well, so do I. And hey, you look about my age. Where did you go to high school? ”
“Oh I went to Francis Lewis over on Utopia. Graduated in ‘66. How ’bout you? ”
“Get out. I went to Francis Lewis. And I graduated in ‘66, too. Where’d you go to college? ”
“Baylor, in Texas. ”
“No way! I went to Baylor too. What dorm? ”
“Kevin Sullivan dorm. ”
“Sullivan? You’re not going to believe this. . . ”
Joe the bartender walks over, and the first guy says, “Joe, you won’t believe it in a million years. This guy went to the same high school as me, graduated the same year I did, and went to the same college. We were even in the same dorm. Isn’t that amazing? more...

You Think that McDonald's/Burger King is "real food".

Know more than 5 uses for milk crates.

Can give a guided tour to anyone after 2 weeks!

Call home and think it's a wrong number.

Call your best friend's house and think it's the right number to your house!

Can sing your school's fight song after only one weekend!

Think that going to the mall is a special trip.

Start doing homework!

Have conversations about homework!

Know your roomie's life like it was your own.

Ask your girlfriend "out" to the campus restaurant.

Stay in the dorm for weekends.

Call your dorm room "home".

Have a list of carbon copies as long as I do for one piece of E-Mail!

Start thinking that the only people left on earth are the people who go to your college/university.

Can recommend web sites to your more...

A Russian party-official arrives late at night to his hotel (in Russia). He is not surprised to find that his reservation has been mislaid but he is more than a little peeved that his status in the party isn't enough to get him a good room anyway. However, the clerk insists, the only bed they have left is the fourth bunk in a 4-bed dorm - he'll have to make do with that. The Russian grumbles but eventually he picks up his suitcase and heads for the dorm. On his way, he meets a chamber-maid and thinking he might as well try to make friends with his room-mates, he asks her to bring them four cups of tea.
As he enters the dorm, he finds that the other three guests are Polish, they are having a fairly wild party and they're very drunk. They also ignore him totally from the moment he enters. After sitting there for several minutes, he realizes he can't stand them anymore and decides to pull a joke on them.
He stands up, grasps a floor lamp and speaking into the light-bulb as if more...

In my college dorm we had one of those irritating type guys who was born with more money than most of us could ever dream of earning, and naturally we resented his Porsche, his boat, and the women who hung all over same. The guy went out of his way to remind us all about his money, car, and especially the women. Most of us were 2 and 3 to a dorm room, but he had a room all to himself at the end of the hall in the dorm.
So... when he took off for an extended weekend, a bunch of us theatre department freaks went to his door, removed the doorknob, plastered over the entire wall at the end of the hall, nailed up new wood molding, painted the entire hallway a new color and changed all the remaining door numbers. When our "target" returned, his room had simply vanished!