Cruz Jokes

THE TWELVE DAYS OF CHRISTMAS.... SANTA CRUZ STYLE...

On the 12th day of the Eurocentrically imposed midwinter festival, my Significant Other in a consenting adult, monogamous relationship gave to me:

TWELVE males reclaiming their inner warrior through ritual drumming,

ELEVEN pipers piping (plus the 18-member pit orchestra made up of members in good standing of the Musicians Equity Union as called for in their union contract even though they will not be asked to play a note),

TEN melanin deprived testosterone-poisoned scions of the patriarchal ruling class system leaping,

NINE persons engaged in rhythmic self-expression,

EIGHT economically disadvantaged female persons stealing milk-products from enslaved Bovine-Americans,

SEVEN endangered swans swimming on federally protected wetlands,

SIX enslaved Fowl-Americans producing stolen non-human animal products,

FIVE golden symbols of more...

THE TWELVE DAYS OF CHRISTMAS... SANTA CRUZ STYLE...
On the 12th day of the Eurocentrically imposed midwinter festival, my Significant Other in a consenting adult, monogamous relationship gave to me:
TWELVE males reclaiming their inner warrior through ritual drumming,
ELEVEN pipers piping (plus the 18-member pit orchestra made up of members in good standing of the Musicians Equity Union as called for in their union contract even though they will not be asked to play a note),
TEN melanin deprived testosterone-poisoned scions of the patriarchal ruling class system leaping,
NINE persons engaged in rhythmic self-expression,
EIGHT economically disadvantaged female persons stealing milk-products from enslaved Bovine-Americans,
SEVEN endangered swans swimming on federally protected wetlands,
SIX enslaved Fowl-Americans producing stolen non-human animal products,
FIVE golden symbols of culturally sanctioned enforced domestic incarceration,
(NOTE after more...

THE TWELVE DAYS OF CHRISTMAS... SANTA CRUZ STYLE...On the 12th day of the Eurocentrically imposed midwinter festival, my Significant Other in a consenting adult, monogamous relationship gave to me:TWELVE males reclaiming their inner warrior through ritual drumming, ELEVEN pipers piping (plus the 18-member pit orchestra made up of members in good standing of the Musicians Equity Union as called for in their union contract even though they will not be asked to play a note), TEN melanin deprived testosterone-poisoned scions of the patriarchal ruling class system leaping, NINE persons engaged in rhythmic self-expression, EIGHT economically disadvantaged female persons stealing milk-products from enslaved Bovine-Americans, SEVEN endangered swans swimming on federally protected wetlands, SIX enslaved Fowl-Americans producing stolen non-human animal products, FIVE golden symbols of culturally sanctioned enforced domestic incarceration,(NOTE after members of the Animal Liberation Front more...

Matthew McConaughey and Penelope Cruz have broken up. Reportedly, McConaughey is looking for a more "American-style beard."

1. "My hard disk won't boot". I suggest they take the floppy
> out of drive A:. Later when I arrive, they have successfully
> removed the floppy drive from the machine (with the floppy disk
> still inside).
>
> 2. "My dog goes nuts when I run Windows. No problem with any
> DOS programs". Her monitor had a cracked flyback transformer.
> When the multisync monitor switched scan rates upon entering
> Windows, the high frequency audio produced by the broken flyback
> was heard by the dog.
>
> 3. "Michaelangelo virus ate my hard disk, but I have a tape
> backup. Can you help me restore the system". No problem.
> When I arrive, I find the data on the tape was 18 months old and
> that she had never run a backup. "I thought you just shoved
> in the tape and it sucked up the data".
>
> 4. "How do I get on the national data information super highway?".
> I more...