Copies Jokes / Recent Jokes

YOU WILL EXPERIENCE GREAT SEX within four days of receiving this letter, provided you send it on. Since the copy must tour the world, you must make ten copies and send them to others. This is no joke. Send no money. Send copies to people who need to GET LAID within 96 hours.

After he passed this letter on, a Montana Spinach Control Officer got his penis stuck in a cow-milking machine and had the longest series of orgasms of his life.

John Elliot tried to pick up a prostitute, but, because he broke the chain, was picked up by the police instead. When they searched his home, they found magazines of little boys which they showed to his neighbors.

In a suburb of Paris, Don Loray's trousers were ripped by an unsatisfied erection 51 days after failing to circulate the letter. However, before this happened, a condom machine gave him three condoms for the price of one (was this the consolation prize?).

Do note the following: Hebert Pudstrom received more...

You will experience great sex within four days of receiving this letter, provided you pass it on (use the "Email This To A Friend or Social Bookmark It!" above or post a link on your favorite message board or blog). Since the copy must tour the world, you must make ten copies and send them to others. This is no joke. Send no money. Send copies to people who need to get laid within 96 hours. Don't believe this is serious business? Read some of these true stories:
* After he passed this letter on, a Montana Spinach Control Officer got his penis stuck in a cow-milking machine and had the longest series of orgasms of his life.
* John Elliot tried to pick up a prostitute, but, because he broke the chain, was picked up by the police instead. When they searched his home, they found magazines of little boys which they showed to his neighbors.
* In a suburb of Paris, Don Loray's trousers were ripped by an unsatisfied erection, 51 days after failing to circulate the more...

A monk joins a abbey ready to dedicate his life to copying ancient books by hand. After the first day though, he reports to the head priest. He's concerned that all the monks have been copying from copies made from still more copies. "If someone makes a mistake," he points out. "It would be impossible to detect. Even worse the error would continue to be made."A bit startled, the priest decides that he better check their latest effort against the original which is kept in a vault beneath the abbey. A place only he has access to.Well two days, then three days pass without the priest resurfacing. Finally the new monk decides to see if the old guy is alright. When he gets down there though, he discovers the priest hunched over both a newly copied book and the ancient original text. He is sobbing and by the look of things has been sobbing for a long time."Father?" the monk whispers.
"oh lord jesus," the priest wails. "The word is more...

This article came from a fellow named Keith Wortham.
In anticipation of a PC MAGAZINE review of the well promoted but NON-AVAILABLE Microsoft Windows 4. 0, he went ahead and wrote it in the typical "objective" style the magazine usually uses with Microsoft products. He is planning to submit it to the magazine before they can come out with their own bubbly "review" of the promised product.
As you know, the magazine carries big ads for Microsoft. From what I am told, ZIFF-DAVIS, which owns PC MAGAZINE, ALSO OWNS A SUBSIDIARY THAT HAS THE MARKETING ACCOUNT FOR MICROSOFT! (Does that strike you as a bit of a CONFLICT OF INTEREST, and ample incentive for total "non-objectivity?")
Quoting Keith Wortham:
"The latest issue of PC Magazine contains the exciting and long awaited news that there will be an article on Windows 4. 0 appearing in the next issue. To save those of you who do not subscribe from having to buy the magazine, we thought more...

This is not a chain letter. It was not started decades ago in the
Netherlands, nor was it perpetrated centuries ago by some deranged monk on
Easter Island (which is highly unlikely in the first place, since EMACS
only works on smart display terminals, and they weren't available on Easter
Island back then, due largely to the U.S. state department's vigorous ban on
exportation of advanced technology to deranged monks on equatorial islands).
There is no luck associated with this letter. Hence, it is
pointless to send five copies of this letter to people you like. In fact,
it is vigorously discouraged, since, by sending this letter through the
postal service, you are needlessly burdening an already overworked system.
You also increase the chance of the postal service losing mail. Murphy's
Law will take effect here, resulting in your letter being delivered the next
day, and a Red Cross package to a needy individual in Zimbabwe to more...

A new monk arrives at the monastery and is assiged to help the other monks in copying the old texts by hand. When he looks closer, however, he notices that they are copying copies, not the original books.
The new monk goes to the head monk to ask him about this. He points out to the head monk that should there be an error in the first copy, that error would be continued in all of the other copies.
"We have been copying from the copies for centuries," says the head monk, "however, I must admit you make a very good point, my son."
The head monk then goes down to the cellar with one of the copies to check it against the original. Hours pass and no one sees him, so one of the monks decides to go downstairs to look for him. When he arrives he hears loud sobbing coming from the back of the cellar and finds the old head monk leaning over one of the original books crying.
"What's wrong," he asks the old monk.
"The word is CELEBRATE!" more...

A new young monk arrives at the monastery.

He is assigned to help the other monks in copying the old canons and laws of the church by hand.

He notices, however, that all of the monks are copying from copies, not from
the original manuscript.

So, the new monk goes to the head abbot to question this, pointing out that if someone made even a small error in the first copy, it would never be picked up. In fact, that error would be continued in all of the subsequent copies.

The head monk, says, "We have been copying from the copies for centuries, but
you make a good point, my son."

So, he goes down into the dark caves underneath the monastery where the
original manuscript is held as archives in a locked vault that hasn't been opened for hundreds of years.

Hours go by and nobody sees the old abbot.

So, the young monk gets worried and goes downstairs to look for him.

He sees him more...