Coke Jokes / Recent Jokes
An Irishman in a wheelchair entered a restaurant one afternoon and asked the waitress for a cup of coffee.
The Irishman looked across the restaurant and asked, "Is that Jesus sitting over there?"
The waitress nodded yes, so the Irishman told her to give Jesus a cup of coffee on him.
The next patron to come in was an Englishman with a hunched back. He shuffled over to a booth, painfully sat down, and asked the waitress for a cup of hot tea. He also glanced across the restaurant and asked, "Is that Jesus over there?"
The waitress nodded, so the Englishman said to give Jesus a cup of hot tea, "My treat."
The third patron to come into the restaurant was a redneck on crutches. He hobbled over to a booth, sat down, and hollered, "Hey there, sweet thang! How's about gettin' me a cold glass of Coke?"
He, too, looked across the restaurant and asked, "Is that God's boy over there?" The waitress once more nodded, so the more...
a man walks into a bar and says i want a beer with a side o f a coke the chinese waitergoes and pees in the coke and comes back with the coke and beer the guy takes a sip of coke and sprays it out in disgust and the waiter dances around chanting me chinese me no joke me go peepee in your coke this happens to two more people before a cowboy comes in same thing happens and after the chinese man gets done with his little chant of his the cowboy pulls him by the colar and whispers into his ear me cowboy me shoot fast me shott bulets up your____
"I haven't had a drink in seven days. Or anything," she says. "I'm not even legal to, so why would I? I don't drink when I go to clubs. I drink with my friends at home, but there's no need to. I feel better not drinking. It's more fun. I have Red Bull. Sometimes I put some vodka in it. I don't drink though. Occasionally I will have a shot of tequila when I'm doing coke. But I don't do coke. Sometimes I have a little coke when I've been doing heroin all day. Which makes it fortunate that I don't do heroin. Except during my menstrual period...and other days. Wow, that was a mouthful, I could use a drink. But I don't drink."
A cowboy walks into a bar and asks for a coke. He takes a sip and says"This coke tasts like shit" the bartender says "me chinese me play joke me go peepee in your coke" A second cowboy walks into the bar and asks for a coke he takes a sip and says "This coke tasts like piss" The bartender says "I am Russian you are joke I go poopoo in your coke" A third cowboy walks in and asks for a coke he takes a sip and says "This coke tasts like balls" The bartender says "Me am indian me do joke me beat off in your coke" The cowboy says "Me cowboy me draw fast me shoot bullet up your ass!!!
a cowboy walks into a chineese guys bar and says bartender give me a coke.the bartender laughs real hard after the cowboy drinks the coke and the guy says me chineese me play joke me go peepee in your coke the cowboy says oh yeah me cowboy me so fast me put bullet in your ass the chineese guy says uhoh (BANG)
A blonde woman was standing at the pop machine; she put in her money and pressed the Coke button and out came a can of Coke. She looked at it and smiled. She took out a dollar, put it in the pop machine pressed the 7Up button and out came a can of 7Up. She looked at it and really started smiling. She put in the change from her dollar and pressed the Coke button again, out came another can of Coke. Then she was just beaming!
There was a man standing there watching her, and he finally went up to her and said, "What are you doing?" She looked at him and said, "Duh, I'm winning!"