Boy Jokes / Recent Jokes

A little boy goes up to his father and asks: "Dad, what's the difference between hypothetical and reality?" The father replies: "Well son, I could give you the book definitions, but I feel it could be best to show you by example. Go upstairs and ask your mother if she'd have sex with the mailman for $500, 000." The boy goes and asks his mother: "Mom, would you have sex with the mailman for $500, 000?" The mother replies: "Hell yes I would!" The little boy returns to his father: "Dad, she said' Hell yes I would!'" The father then says: "Okay, now go and ask your older sister if she'd have sex with her principal for $500, 000." The boy asks his sister: "Would you have sex with your principal for $500, 000?" The sister replies: "Hell yes I would!" He returns to his father: "Dad, she said' Hell yes I would!'" The father answers: "Okay son, here's the deal: Hypothetically, we're millionaires, but more...

A pregnant Irish woman from Dublin gets in a car accident and falls into a deep coma. Asleep for nearly 6 months, when she wakes up she sees that she is no longer pregnant and frantically asks the doctor about her baby.

The doctor replies,' Ma'am you had twins! a boy and a girl. Your brother from Cork came in and named them.'

The woman thinks to herself,' Oh No, not my brother... he's an idiot!' She asks the doctor,' Well, what's the girl's name?' Denise.'

'Wow, that's not a bad name, I like it! What's the boy's name?'

'Denephew.'

Two math students, a boy and his girlfriend, are going to a fair. They are in line to ride the ferris wheel when it shuts down.
The boy says: "It's a sin for those people to keep us waiting like this!"
The girl replies: "No - it's a cosin, silly!!!"

A Soviet emigre boy and girl come to a doctor's office and say: "Doctor, we would like to know if we are screwing properly. Will you watch us, please?" The doctor, somewhat puzzled, agrees, they climb on his table, the boy gets on top of the girl, and they have sex. After observing them, the doctor says, "Yes, you're having sex properly. That will be forty dollars." They come back the next day with the same request, but this time the boy enters the girl from the rear. They keep coming for four days in a row, using different positions every day. On the fifth visit the doctor says, "Why do you keep on coming back? I told you you're having sex properly." The boy explains, "The hotel room costs the same forty dollars, but this way we get reimbursed by Medicaid."

Q: Girl friend & boy friend go for a movie. In the dark, a
mosquito enters the girl's skirt. Guess where it would have
bitten?
A. The boy's hand

Q: What is the similarity between men and rats?
A: Both keep searching for new HOLES.

Q: What is the closest thing similar to a woman's period?
A: Your salary, it comes once a month lasts about 5-days and if
it doesn't come means you are in big trouble.

Q: What's the difference between biology and sociology?
A: When the baby looks like his dad or mom, then it is biology.
When the baby looks like the neighbour, then it is sociology.

Q: What's the height of recycling?
A: Sending a sanitary napkin for dry cleaning

Q: Doctor: You look so weak & exhausted. Are you having 3 meals
a day as I have advised?
A. Lady: Doctor, I thought you had said 3 males a day

Q: Tarzan and the animals went to the river to take a bath.
Tarzan more...

The teacher turns to the class and says, "Today, we will use these three words in a sentence. Defense, detail, and defeat. Tom, why don't you go first?" Tom, a white kid, goes first. Tom says, "Ahh, the football team's defense was detailed in the paper which caused the defeat of the other team." (The narrator's tone is slang-American when saying this sentence.) The teacher turns to Chang, a Chinese boy, and says, "How about you Chang?" Chang says, (narrator uses a Chinese accent), "the Defense Department gave details of the defeat of the guerrillas." "That's very good Chang, now what about you, Bong-Bong?" says the teacher. "Use defense, detail, and defeat in a sentence." Bong-Bong, the Filipino boy, doesn't want to do it. (Accent of narrator becomes heavily influenced by Ilocano or Tagalog accent). "Ma'am, ay don't know how to use it," says Bong-Bong. "Come on, just try," says the teacher. "Okay, more...

One day there was a boy at school and his teacher told him to get 4 spelling words. 1st he went to his Brother and asked "Could you give me a spelling word?" His Brother answered "ShutUp" So he wrote down Shutup. 2nd he went to his Mother and asked her. She answered "Certainly" He wrote down certinly. 3rd he wen to his Dad and asked for somthing sweet. His dad answered Lolipop so he wrote down Lolipop. 4th he went to his little brother and asked the question. He answered "In my Little Blue Car" The next day he went to school and his teacher asked for the words. He said his 1st word Shutup. Then she asked "Do you want to go to the principles office?" He said is second word "Certainly". In the principals office the principal asked what do you think you deserve, the boy answered "Lolipop!!" Then the principal asked "What do you think your punishment should be?" The boy answered "To go in my Little Blue more...