Barbara Jokes / Recent Jokes

Mr. Smith, president of a large corporation, called his vice president into his office. "We're making some cutbacks, so either Jack or Barbara will have to be laid off."
Dave looked at Mr. Smith and said, "Barbara is my best worker, but Jack has a wife and three kids. I don't know who to fire."
The next morning Dave waited for his employees to arrive. Barbara was the first to come in. So Dave said, "Barbara, I've got to lay you or Jack off and I don't know what to do".
Barbara replied, "You'd better jack-off, I've got a headache."

Q: Who were Jenna and Barbara Bush with when they got caught by the police?
A: Their uncle Anheuser

Regis: "Barbara, you've done very well so far - $500, 000 and one lifeline left -- phone a friend. The next question will give you the top prize of One Million dollars if you get it right. .. but if you get it wrong you will drop back to $32, 000 -- are you ready?" Barbara: "Sure, I'll have a go!" Regis: "Which of the following birds does not build it's own nest? Is it........ A-Robin B-Sparrow C-Cuckoo D-Thrush Remember Barbara its worth 1 Million dollars." "I think I know who it.. but I'm not 100%... No, I haven't got a clue. I'd like to phone a friend Regis, just to be sure. Regis: "Yes, who, Barbara, do you want to phone? Barbara: "I'll phone my friend Maggie back home in Birmingham." (ringing) Maggie (also a blonde): "Hello..." Regis: "Hello Maggie, its Regis here from Who Wants to be a Millionaire-I have Barbara here and she is doing really well on $500, 000, but needs your help to be a Million. The next voice you more...

One day Mr. Smith, the president of a large corporation, called his vice-president, Dave, into his office and said, "We're making some cutbacks, so either Jack or Barbara will have to be laid off." Dave looked at Mr. Smith and said, "Barbara is my best worker, but Jack has a wife and three kids. I don't know whom to fire." The next morning Dave waited for his employees to arrive. Barbara was the first to come in, so Dave said, "Barbara, I've got a problem. You see, I've got to lay you or Jack off and I don't know what to do?" Barbara replied, "You'd better jack off. I've got a headache."

A blonde named Barbara is appearing on Who Wants To Be A Millionaire...
Regis: "Barbara, you've done very well so far -$500, 000 and one life line left -- phone a friend. The next question will give you the first ever Million dollars if you get it right... but if you get it wrong you will drop back to $32, 000 -- are you ready?"
Barbara: "Sure I'll have a go"
Regis: "Which of the following birds does not build its own nest? Is it...
A-Robin
B-Sparrow
C-Cuckoo
D-Thrush.
"Remember Barbara its worth 1 Million dollars.
Barbara: " I think I know who it... but I'm not 100%... No, I haven't got a clue. I'd like to phone a friend Regis just to be sure."
Regis: "Yes, who, Barbara, do you want to phone?
Barbara: "I'll phone my friend Carol back home in Brooklyn." (ringing)
Carol (also a blonde): "Hello..."
Regis: "Hello Carol, it's Regis Philbin here from Who more...

Regis: "Barbara, you've done very well so far - $500,000 and one lifeline left - phone a friend. The next question will give you the top prize of One Million dollars if you get it right... but if you get it wrong you will drop back to $32,000 - are you ready?" Barbara: "Sure, I'll have a go!" Regis: "Which of the following birds does not build it's own nest? Is it... A-Robin B-Sparrow C-Cuckoo D-Thrush Remember Barbara its worth 1 Million dollars." "I think I know who it..but I'm not 100%... No, I haven't got a clue. I'd like to phone a friend Regis, just to be sure. Regis: "Yes, who, Barbara, do you want to phone? Barbara: "I'll phone my friend Maggie back home in Birmingham." (ringing) Maggie (also a blonde): "Hello..." Regis: "Hello Maggie, its Regis here from Who Wants to be a Millionaire-I have Barbara here and she is doing really well on $500,000, but needs your help to be a Million. The next voice you hear will be more...

Barbara Walters was doing a documentary on the customs of American Indians. After touring their reservation, she was curious about the number of feathers in the headdresses.
She approached one brave, who only had one feather in his headdress, and asked, "Why is there a difference in the number of feathers in the headdresses?"
"One feather, one squaw," he replied.
Thinking he must be joking, she asked another brave the same question. This brave had five feathers in his headdress. "Five feathers, five squaws," he replied.
Still not convinced that the number of feathers really indicated the number of squaws involved, Barbara decided to interview the Chief. Now the Chief had a headdress full of feathers which, needless to say, amused her.
"Chief, why do you have so many feathers in your headdress?" asked Ms. Walters.
Pounding his chest proudly, the Chief replied, "Me Chief. Me fuck-em all. Big, small, fat, tall, me more...