Anal Jokes / Recent Jokes

Q: What's the difference between oral sex and anal sex?
A: Oral sex makes your whole day, anal sex makes your hole weak.

10% of the women had sex within the first hour of their first date.
20% of the men had sex in a non-traditional place.
36% of the women favour nudity.
45% of the women prefer dark men with blue eyes.
46% of the women experienced anal sex.
70% of the women prefer sex in the morning.
80% of the men have never experienced homosexual relations.
90% of the women would like to have sex in the forest.
99% of the women have never experienced sex in the office.
Conclusion:
Statistically speaking, you have a better chance of having anal sex in the morning with a strange woman in the forest than to have sex in the office at the end of the day.
Moral:
Do not stay late in the office. Nothing good will ever come of it!

A woman calls her boss one morning and tells him that she is not comming in because she is not feeling well.
"Whats the matter?" he asked.
"I have anal glaucoma." she says in a weak voice.
"What the hell is anal glaucoma?"
I cant see my asss comming to work today.

A woman calls her boss one morning and tells him that she is staying home because she is not feeling well."What's the matter?" he asks."I have a case of Anal Glaucoma," she says in a weak voice.He asks: "What the hell is Anal Glaucoma?"She responds: "I can't see my ass coming into work today."

A woman calls her boss one morning and tells hom that she is not comming in because she is not feeling well.
"Whats the matter?" he asked.
"I have anal glaucoma." she says in a weak voice.
"What the hell is anal glaucoma?"
I cant see my asss comming to work today.

True story: A customer walks into a pharmacy and asks assistant for an anal deodorant. The assistant explains that they don't stock them. The man insists that he bought his last one from this store.

The assistant passes man on to the pharmacist, who explains that store has never stocked such an item. The man explains he bought his last one from this store only weeks ago and has done for several years. The pharmacist asks man to bring in his last purchase and he will try to match the product.

The following day, the man returns to the pharmacy and shows the deodorant to the pharmacist. The pharmacist asks why the customer thinks this is an anal deodorant, when it is obviously of the underarm stick variety. The customer explains that instructions on reverse state,' Push up bottom to use.'

Did You Know...
Did you know that in the human body there is a nerve that connects the eyeball to the anus?
It is called the anal optic nerve.
It is responsible for giving people a crappy outlook on life.
If you don't believe it, pull a hair from your ass, and see if it doesn't bring a tear to your eye.