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Joke Buddha Search / marketing

Topics: Marketing
Authors: no match

Girlfriend 1.0 software

Last year, my friend upgraded his GirlFriend 3.1 to GirlFriendPlus1.0 (marketing name: Fiancee1.0).Recently he upgraded Fiancee1.0 to Wife1.0, and it's a memory hogger! It has taken all his space; and Wife1.0 must be running before he can do anything. Although he didn't ask for them, Wife1.0 came ...

 Computing, Internet, Running, System, Girlfriend, Tried, Button, Slow, Files, Install
www.jokebuddha.com/joke/Girlfriend_10_software_1

Girlfriend Upgrades

Last year, my friend upgraded his GirlFriend 3.1 to GirlFriend Plus 1.0 (marketing name: Fiance 1.0). Recently he upgraded Fiance 1.0 to Wife 1.0 and it's a memory hogger: has taken up all his space. Wife 1.0 must be running before he can do anything and seems to conflict/interfere with other tasks ...

 Wife, Will, Computing, Internet, Running, System, Girlfriend, Tried, Button, Memory
www.jokebuddha.com/joke/Girlfriend_Upgrades_2

Proper terms for today's woman

... : CUT YOU OFF She becomes: HORIZONTALLY INACCESSIBLE She does not have: BIG HAIR She is: OVERLY AEROSOLED She does not: SHOP TOO MUCH She is: OVERLY SUSCEPTIBLE TO MARKETING PLOYS

 You, She, Sex, Not, Dirty, Adult, Bad, Becomes, Horizontally
www.jokebuddha.com/joke/Proper_terms_for_todays

Upgrading

Last year, my friend upgraded his GirlFriend3. 1 to GirlFriendPlus1. 0 (marketing name: Fiancee1. 0). Recently he upgraded Fiancee1. 0 to Wife1. 0 and it's a memory hogger, it has taken all his space; and Wife1. 0 must be running before he can do anything. Although he did not ask for it, Wife1. 0 ...

 You, All, Don, Running, Tried, Girlfriend, Button, Files, Install, Feature
www.jokebuddha.com/joke/Upgrading

Engineer Identification Test

... answer is "C" but partial credit can be given to anybody who writes "It depends" in the margin of the test or simply blames the whole stupid thing on "Marketing."

 Test, Picture
www.jokebuddha.com/joke/Engineer_Identification_1

The Male`s Mind

... is well-documented. As marketing targets, men are suckers for terms like "professional"or "industrial strength", because inside every man is the germ of every profession he ever imagined himself one day excelling at. Most of these purchases are harmless, little more than childish wish-fulfilment played out at a higher testorerone level ...

 You, Man, Time, All, Like, Home, Never, Work, Little, Out
www.jokebuddha.com/joke/The_23

How to look busy

... an important telephone marketing survey.Reality: You are pretending to take notes while talking to your friend who has called collect from Bulgaria.Appearance: You are on the phone with a client in New York and you have said, "Yes sirree! That stock is about to shoot through the roof, now's a great time to buy, I tell ya!"Reality: You are on the phone ...

 Time, Business, Work, Computer, Your, Friend, Phone, Great, Through, While
www.jokebuddha.com/joke/How_to_look_busy

TOP TEN REASONS TO GO TO WORK NAKED...1. Your boss...

... To stop those creepy guys in Marketing from looking down your blouse.5. You want to see if it`s like the dream.6. So that with a little help from Muzak you can add "Exotic Dancer" to your exaggerated resume.7. People stop stealing your pens after they`ve seen where you keep them.8. Diverts attention from the fact that you also came to work drunk.9. Gives ...

 Work, Your, Boss, Stop, Naked, Reasons, Top Ten
www.jokebuddha.com/joke/TOP_TEN_REASONS_TO_GO_TO

Job Placement

... experience, send them to Tech Pubs. If they don't even look up when you enter the room, assign them to Security. If they try to tell you it's not as bad as it looks, send them to Marketing. And if they've left early, put them in Sales.

 You, Time, Two, Room, Table, Job, Send, Chairs, Assign, Placement
www.jokebuddha.com/joke/Job_Placement_1

Q: How many hardware folks does it take to change a light bulb?

A': None. They just have marketing portray the dead bulb as a feature.

 Bulb
www.jokebuddha.com/joke/Q_How_many_hardware_folks_does_it_take_to_change_a_light_bulb
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