"college galatta" joke

junior: Is never in bed past noon. Senior: Is never out of bed before noon. junior: Reads the syllabus to find out what classes he can cut. Senior: Reads the syllabus to find out what classes he needs to attend. junior: Brings a can of soda into a lecture hall. Senior: Brings a jumbo hoagie and six-pack of Mountain Dew into a recitation class. junior: Calls the professor "Teacher." Senior: Calls the professor "Bob." junior: Would walk ten miles to get to class. Senior: Drives to class if it's more than three blocks away. junior: Memorizes the course material to get a good grade. Senior: Memorizes the professor's habits to get a good grade. junior: Knows a book-full of useless trivia about the university. Senior: Knows where the next class is. Usually. junior: Shows up at a morning exam clean, perky, and fed. Senior: Shows up at a morning exam in sweats with a cap on and a box of pop tarts in hand. junior Has to ask where the computer labs are. Senior: Has own personal workstation. junior: Lines up for an hour to buy his textbooks in the first week. Senior: Starts to think about buying textbooks in October... maybe. junior: Looks forward to first classes of the year. Senior: Looks forward to first beer garden of the year. junior: Is proud of his A+ on Calculus I midterm Senior: Is proud of not quite failing his Complex Analysis midterm junior: Calls his girlfriend back home every other night Senior: Calls Domino's every other night junior: Is appalled at the class size and callousness of professors Senior: Is appalled that the campus' Subway' burned down over the summer junior: Conscientiously completes all homework, including optional questions Senior: Homework? I knew I forgot to do something last night junior: Goes on grocery-shopping trip with Mom before moving onto campus Senior: Has a beer with Mom before moving into group house junior: Is excited about the world of possibilities that awaits him, the unlimited vista of educational opportunities, the chance to expand one's horizons and really make a contribution to society Senior: Is excited about new dryers in laundry room junior: Takes meticulous four-color notes in class Senior: Occasionally stays awake for all of class ha ha ha

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