"You know you are a Hmong if:" joke

Your only close friends are Hmong people. You hate "white" music and only listen to pop, techno, rap or r&b music, which, of course, are not "white". N'sync is black. You wear platforms and stylish clothes (girls). You wear baggy or preppy clothes (boys). You live in a Hmong community and never leave. If you leave, you always end up coming back. Your parents compare who has the worst kids. You have a rice cooker and buy 100 lbs. of rice every month. You have a whole pig/cow/chicken in your refrigerator. You have over ten kids in the family. Your parents/grandparents can't speak English. You have a baby or get married before you turn sixteen. All you think about is boys/girls. You know someone who works in a factory. You have cockroaches in your house. Family is the most important thing in your life. You go to all the Hmong tournaments in the summer. You have Hmong pride. You know how to spell "kuv hlub koj" and that's it. You live in Wisconsin, Minnesota or California or knows someone who lives there. You have relatives in France, Thailand or Laos. The younger generation likes to go on-line and hook up with other Hmong people.

In a crowded city at a crowded bus stop, a beautiful blonde was waiting for the bus. She was decked out in a tight leather mini skirt with matching tight leather boots and jacket. As the bus rolled up and it became her turn to get on, she became aware that her skirt was too more...


Knock Knock
Who's there!
Gopher who!
Gopher a long walk off a short pier! Knock Knock
Who's there!
Gopher who!
Gopher your gun, Sheriff! Knock Knock
Who's there!
Gopher who!
Gopher broke!


Why is santa claus always so happy?
He knows where all of the bad girls live!


I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow and
asked loudly, "How much do you charge for a shampoo and a blow job?" I
turned around and walked back out and never went back My husband didn't
say a word...
he more...


A lawyer and a blonde are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The lawyer leans over to her and asks if she would like to play a fun game. The blonde just wants to take a nap, so she politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few more...

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