"The Peg-Legged Prospector" joke

During the gold rush in the Yukon, there was a bar called "Stake Your Claim" that served many of the gold prospectors. One night an elderly peg-legged prospector came into the bar and ordered a beer. The bartender said, "Never seen you in here before, are you new in these parts?" The peg-legged man replied, "Yep, just came up here from Californee once the gold panning ran dry there."
After the bartender served the guy about his 6th beer, the peg-legged prospector asked the bartender where the bathroom was. The bartender explained that the bathroom was an outhouse at the top of a little hill, just behind the building. The bartender said, "You'll have to climb up the hill for about a hundred feet, and the hill is really icy from all he snow we've been having. I'd better give you a hand getting up the hill, because you'll never make it with those peg-legs." The prospector said, "I've been walking with these peg legs for 50 years, I can make it up any hill, no matter how icy it is."
About an hour later, the bartender noticed that the peg-legged prospector still hadn't come back to the bar from the outhouse. He saw several other customers coming back into the bar from the outhouse and asked them if they had seen the guy with the peg-legs. They said they hadn't. So, the bartender started walking up the hill to look for him.
Eventually, he saw two pegs sticking out of a snowbank on the side of the hill. He grabbed them and pulled the nearly frozen stiff old prospector out of the snowbank. The bartender then said, "You stubborn old geezer, I told you I'd help you get up the hill!"
The peg-legged prospector replied, "I got up the hill just fine and was sitting down on the outhouse toilet, when all of a sudden some guy burst through the door and screamed, 'Hey, who put this wheelbarrow in here?' and threw me over the side of the hill!"

Teacher: Why are you late to school?
Kevin: Because of the sign.
Teacher: What sign?
Kevin: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."

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A mother was preparing pancakes for her sons Kevin, 5, and Ryan, 3. The boys began to argue over who would get the first pancake. Their mother saw the opportunity for a moral lesson; "If Jesus were sitting here, He would say 'Let my brother have the first pancake, I can more...

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While I was watching a basketball game on TV last weekend, my wife and I got into a conversation about life and death and the need for living wills. During the course of the conversation, I told her that I never wanted to exist in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine more...

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Teacher to naughtiest boy in class: " Tell me; Ramu; why is the globe
flattened only at the Poles and not anywhere else? "

Ramu to the teacher: "I swear miss; I didn' t do anything. The globe was in the same Condition last year! "

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Two blondes walk into a bar. You'd think at least one of them would've seen it.

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