"TEXONICS" joke

Currently, the language is broadcast in many forms, the most notable being Big Tex, a large Texan who broadcasts soley at the Texas State Fair in October each year. His grass roots efforts over the last 40 years have led to a full program being considered by The Texas School System and Ross Perot.
Here is a sample of the curriculum for the beginning language study program:
ahz: the thi aig: which come first, the chi arn: an electrical instrument used to remove wrinkl bawl: what water does bidness: comme bobbycue: a delectable southern sandwich of chopped pork, cole slaw co-cola: any form/bran clin cri dawfins: name of the pro footba daints: a more or less formal event in which members of the opposite sex hold each other and move rhythmically to the dayum: an expletive; in other states, a f doc: a condition caused by an ever: each, as in "She's bin crine ever day sin far: git: goff: a game played with clubs and a li hep: a cry for assistance, as in "HEP! hoss: a large, solid-hoofed, her lectricity: energy for arns, tvs, liberry: a building where thousands of literary nekkid: ole well: a sou own: opposite of awf ( paypuh: w shevuhlay: a Ge spearmint: somethi stow: establishment where tar: a round inflatable object which some uhmurkin: someone who lives in the united s zackly: precisely

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