"Son of a bitch confession" joke

One day a girl went to church to make a confession
GIRL: Forgive me father for I have sined
PRIEST: What have you done my child
GIRL: I called a man a son of a bitch
PRIEST: Why did you call him a son of a bitch
GIRL: Caused he touched my hand
PRIEST: Like this, (as he touches her hand)
GIRL:Yes father.
PRIEST: That's no reason to call a man a son of a bitch
GIRL: Then he touched my breast.
PRIEST: Like this, (as he touched her breast)
GIRL: Yes father
PRIEST: That's no reason to call him a son of a bitch
GIRL: Then he took off my clothes father
PRIEST: Like this, (as he takes off her clothes)
GIRL: Yes father
PRIEST: That's no reason to call him a son of a bitch
GIRL: Then he stuck his you know what into my you know where
PRIEST: Like this, (as he stuck his you know what into her you know here)
GIRL: YES FATHER, YES FATHER, YES FATHER
PRIEST: (after a few minutes) that's no reason to call him a son of a bitch
GIRL: But father he had AIDS
PRIEST: THAT SON OF A BITCH!!!

A couple of women were playing golf one sunny Saturday morning. The first of the twosome teed off and watched in horror as her ball headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next hole.
Indeed, the ball hit one of the men, and he immediately clasped his hands more...

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A little boy heard his mom and dad fightin and the mom called the dad a bastard and he called her a bitch so the boy asks whats a bitch and whats a bastard? The parents said well, a bitch is a girl and a bastard is a boy. So the little boy then hears the neighbor say to his more...

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A man goes into his son's room to wish him goodnight.
His son is having a nightmare - the man wakes him and asks his son if he is OK?
The son replies he is scared because he has dreamt that Auntie Susie had died.
The father assures the son that Auntie Susie is fine more...

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