"Snail Beer" joke

A snail goes into a bar and orders a beer.
The barman says 'Sorry we don't serve snails' and throws him out.
A couple of weeks later the snail goes into the bar again and says... 'What did you do that for!'

When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.

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A priest was called away for an emergency. Not wanting to leave the confessional unattended, he called his rabbi friend from across the street and asked him to cover for him.
The rabbi told him he wouldn't know what to say, but the priest told him to come on over and he'd more...

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A duck walks into a general store and asks the manager:
- "Got any fresh fruit?"
- "No."
- "Got any fresh vegetables?"
- "No. We have only canned and dry goods."
The next day, the duck returns:
- "Got any fresh more...

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When NASA first started sending up astronauts, they quickly discovered that ballpoint pens would not work in zero gravity. To combat the problem, NASA scientists spent a decade and $12 billion to develop a pen that writes in zero gravity, upside down, underwater, on almost any more...

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While visiting India, George Bush is invited to tea with
Abdul Kalam. He asks Kalam what his leadership philosophy is. He says
that,
it is to surround himself with intelligent people.
Bush asks how he knows if they`re intelligent.
"I do so by asking more...

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