"Restaurant Efficiency" joke

A couple seated in a Chicago restaurant noticed that all the waiters carried two spoons in their vest pocket. Curious, the man asked their waiter the reason for this.
"Well, sir," the waiter explained, "an efficiency study conducted by management determined that the most frequently dropped silverware item is a spoon. Therefore, all waiters carry two spoons so that the item can be instantly replaced."
As the waiter was offering the explanation to the couple, they noticed there was a string hanging out of the fly of his pants. "What about that?" the man asked, discreetly pointing to the string.
"That, sir, is the result of another efficiency study," the waiter replied. "When we need to go to the bathroom, we use the string to pull ourselves out and aim. Therefore, we do not have to stop to wash our hands."
"We understand how you can get yourself out and aim," the man said, "but how do you go about getting yourself back in?"
"I don't know about the other waiters, sir," the waiter replied, "but I use the two spoons!"

Oh, Doctor, you mean I'm finally cured?" the woman sighed happily.
"Yes Miss Willoughby," said the psychoanalyst, "I believe we now have your kleptomania firmly under control and you can go out in the workaday world just like anybody more...

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