"Ready-made resolutions for interneters - 1998" joke

Stop neglecting children; at least learn their names & birthdays
Read all of the mail from all of the groups I've subscribed to
Limit my subscriptions of e-mail jokes to a maximum of fifty
See if there's anything on those 5 1/4" disks really worth saving
Back-up 5 gig hard drive weekly; well, maybe at least monthly
Not rush to any ftp site as soon as I hear of a new Beta
Insist that all "ten best" lists be strictly limited to ten
Not buy magazines with AOL disks just to get another 1.44MB disk
Answer Snail Mail with the same enthusiasm & promptness as e-mail
Spend less than two hours a day on the Web; on new sites anyway
Promise when I hear "Where do you want to go today ?" I won't laugh
Think of a password other than "password" to use on web sites
Try to keep "Hot" Bookmarks under 1,000 entries
Remember people who use low baud and mhz rates have feelings too
Stop using =-) in all inter-office memos
Start deleting stuff I haven't used in over 5 years
Engage in small talk & not mention computers for at least 10 minutes
Try to think up some new resolutions before next year